Unlikely Unsub
by shelly.hoffer.7
Summary: Hotch is wounded in an explosion; he heals physically, but the team knows it has changed him. Rossi suspects that the change is even deeper than the team could even imagine.
1. Chapter 1

_**Unlikely Unsub**_

**Chapter 1**

The Behavioral Analysis Unit was in Detroit. A serial bomber had blown up a gas station killing two and wounding six, a bus stop killing four, and a the front of a bar killing three and wounding eleven. The only evidence the police could find was the bomb fragments, so they knew it was the same bomber, but with no witnesses and no leads, they asked for the FBI's help. Hotch sent Morgan to look over the bomb fragments, Reid and Blake to start on victimology, and JJ to get a handle on the press. He and Rossi went to look over the crime scenes.

Hotch and Rossi looked over the crippled remains of the bar first. As Hotch looked around the blood soaked rubble, he got the feeling that the case wasn't going to end well.

"Well, he definitely doesn't have any regard for human life," Rossi said as he examined the scene.

"A true psychopath," Hotch agreed.

"He would have to have come into the bar to place the bomb; one of the victims saw him."

"Yes. I'll have JJ set the interviews for tomorrow." Hotch walked over and looked over the damaged bar. Several of the stools were scattered. "Without him claiming these bombs, we can assume these are not cause motivated."

Rossi walked over to join him and grimaced at all of the broken liquor bottles. _Now that's alcohol abuse._ "So he's personally motivated. What does that tell us?"

"That all of these sites mean something; they are not random."

Rossi nodded. "And now all we have to do is figure out how they are connected."

XXX

Once Hotch and Rossi checked out the other scenes, they headed to the police station to meet up with the rest of the team. Morgan had already pieced together one of the bombs. "I don't think he has a background in explosives. These are really pretty rudimentary with a simple cell phone as the trigger. Garcia's running down what she can on the phones, but I believe their burn phones."

"Well, that will make finding him harder. Why does the internet have to make homemade bombs so easy to make? Don't those sights not know how hard our jobs are already?" Blake asked no one in particular.

JJ walked in with a frown on her face. Hotch looked at her questioningly. "The press has already named him. The story ran before we got here."

"And what name did they give him?" Reid asked her.

"Motown Madman."

Hotch rolled his eyes. "Let focus on getting the profile together."

XXX

Hotch and the team were standing in the main room of the station ready to give the profile to all available officers.

"Our unsub is a white male between the ages of 25 and 40," JJ started.

"And he is a personal cause bomber," Rossi started.

"Personal cause?" one of the younger officers asked.

"He's doing this for his own reasons. He's is not connected to any cause or organization," Reid explained.

"He is very smart, meticulous, highly organized, and probably lives alone," Hotch jumped in.

"He is angry, distant, and prone to sudden outbursts," Morgan told them.

"People around him would believe that he is a killer; they would not be shocked," Blake injected.

"He does not have a job, and has probably been recently laid off or fired," Rossi continued.

"And with the type of bombs he is making, he does not have an explosive background," Morgan finished. "And since they are set off with a cell phone, he doesn't have to be close to set them off."

"What is his motivation?" A detective asked.

"As of right now, that is still a mystery," Hotch admitted.

"Well, alright. Everyone get moving and be very aware of your surroundings," the detective told the officers.

XXX

After interviewing the victims, they had a composite of their unsub, but within an hour of getting it, a bomb exploded at an athletic field at one of the local high schools. The team rushed to the scene along with the detective.

Thankfully only one person was hurt, but several sections of bleachers were destroyed. The wounded coach was already taken to the hospital, so Hotch sent JJ and Blake to interview him. After the CSU processed the scene they knew that the bombs had been hidden in something that had stuffing.

"So he's hiding the bombs in something, putting them where he wants them, and waits until he wants to set them off," Morgan said, the frustration clear in his voice.

Hotch and Rossi were examining the stuffing and bomb fragments. Hotch picked up a piece of shredded material with a gloved hand to get a closer look at it. "Does this look like fur?" He asked his team.

Rossi took it inspected it closer. "You thinking stuffed animal?"

"Possibly," Hotch told him as Morgan took the material.

"That's just sick," Morgan said.

"It does give us something to go back to the survivors with," Reid mused.

XXX

It took two more days and another explosion, but they finally had a name to go with the face. Garcia started compiling everything she could on the man. "Mark Thompson worked for GM for seventeen years before he was laid off two weeks ago," she started from Morgan's phone that was lying on the table on speaker..

"That's our stressor," JJ pointed out.

"He owns a house on the east side of Detriot, plus he has two different storage units, one car in his name, never married," Garcia continued. "And before you ask, all of that has been sent to your tablets and phones."

"We'll need to split up to cover them all. Morgan, you and Blake take the house with SWAT. JJ, you and Reid take the storage unit on the west side. Rossi and I will take the storage unit on the east. Be careful and stay in touch," Hotch told them. They all got on their vests and headed to their appointed targets.

XXX

Morgan let SWAT take down the door and he and Blake filed into the house behind four officers. The house was quickly cleared, but an officer yelled that Thompson was in his garage. Morgan quickly ran out there and they found the man standing next to a work bench full of bomb making materials. "Freeze Thompson! Federal agents!" Morgan yelled as he leveled his pistol at het man's back.

XXX

Hotch, Rossi, and four officers approached a sea container that Thompson had rented. It was at the edge of the lot, there was only one other container by it. One of the officers used bolt cutters to remove the lock. He pulled the heavy door open and allowed Hotch and Rossi to enter it first. It was full of boxes and other household items. With a sigh, Hotch opened one of the first boxes. It was full of Thompson's personal items.

"I don't think this is anything except an actual storage unit," Rossi said as he looked in a box that turned out to be full of books.

"Yeah, you're probably right. Hopefully the others have better luck," Hotch told him and went to the next box.

XXX

"I think you all should step back," Thompson told them without even turning around and looking at them.

Morgan shot a look to Blake. "Let me see your hands!" Morgan demanded.

The man slowly raised his hands; his right one held a cell phone.

"Put the phone down slowly!" Blake yelled.

"Oh, I don't think that would be a good idea. When I press the send button. You all will have fifteen seconds before this whole garage blows itself to hell," the man told him calmly.

XXX

JJ, Reid, and four officers were approaching Thompson's storage unit. It was the one on the right all the way down at the end of the hall.

XXX

Hotch's breath hitched in his chest as he realized he was looking at a box full of stuffed bears the same color as the material found at the last explosion.

Rossi turned when he heard Hotch's reaction.

XXX

"Don't do it, man!" Morgan yelled.

The man's thumb pressed the button. "Too late."

Morgan grabbed Blake's shoulder and ran. All of the SWAT officers took off running, too. The force of the blast knocked them off their feet.

XXX

Before JJ and her group could even get half way there the storage unit was ripped apart. The concussion knocked them to the ground.

XXX

Suddenly Hotch heard a vibration that could only belong to a phone. He jumped, forced Rossi in front of him, and forcibly pushed him out of the container in front of him. He kept pushing until he the force of the blast knocked Hotch into Rossi and they both fell to the ground.


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter 2**

"Shit! Are you ok?" Morgan asked Blake as he made his way to his feet.

"Yeah, just a little ringing in my ears," she told him as he helped her up.

All of the SWAT guys were up and dusting themselves off. "Well, I guess we don't have to worry about a trial," one of the officers said as he started walking toward the SWAT truck parked on the street.

"Let's see if there's anything useful in the house," Morgan suggested to Blake.

XXX

Reid moaned as he rolled over onto his stomach and surveyed the damage down the hall. He suddenly realized JJ was on the floor next to him. "JJ! Are you alright?" He yelled as he scooted over next to her.

"Yeah. My God! I sure am glad we weren't any closer to that thing," She told him as he helped her up.

The four police officers were up and one was talking on his radio.

XXX

"Jesus Christ!" Rossi yelled. He was on the ground on his stomach right next to the other sea container. Hotch was on top of him. "You can get off me now, Hotch." Hotch didn't move. "Aaron?" Rossi asked desperately as he struggled to get out from under his friend. He pushed and turned and was finally able to roll Hotch off of him. Rossi knelt next to the all too silent man. "Hotch!" Rossi yelled as he slowly turned Hotch over. His breath caught in his chest as he took in his boss. Hotch's face was bloody from a severe gash on his upper forehead; apparently Hotch's head had slammed into the sea container from the force of the blast.

Rossi tuned to the closest officer. "Get an ambulance here, now!"

The man grabbed his radio and called for a bus.

"Come on Hotch!" Rossi yelled as he searched for a pulse. It was there, but it was weak. "Hold on, Aaron. Help's on the way." Rossi told him tenderly as his eyes watered up. He noticed a clear liquid leaking out of Hotch's ears and nose, and he slowly lifted Hotch's eyelids. His left pupil was dilated more than his right one, and Rossi's stomach twisted, threatening to expel what he had eaten for lunch. That's when he also noticed a piece of metal sticking out of Hotch's right abdomen. He didn't dare pull the offensive piece out, but he put his hands around it to help stop the blood from flowing so freely. "Son of a bitch!"

One of the officers ran up to them. "What can I do?"

"Call my team. See if everyone else is ok," Rossi told him as he hoped theirs was the only bomb to have gone off.

XXX

Garcia had tapped into Detroit PD's system and the alerts of the explosions came onto her screen. She gasped as she realized the three bomb sites where were her family had been headed. She hit speed dial and immediately relaxed a little when Morgan answered with his usual "Hey Baby Girl."

"Are you alright?" she asked even though she thought she knew the answer.

"Yeah. How did you know?"

"Because three explosions have been reported and all three of them were at your all's locations. How's everybody else?"

"All three?" He asked just as desperately as Garcia just had been.

"I'll call Hotch!" she told him as she hit another button on her phone. It rang three times and went to voicemail. "Oh, Derek. . ."

"Hold on, someone's calling," Morgan told her and she could tell he had switched calls.

She went ahead and called JJ and relaxed a little more when she found out her and Reid were also fine. She connected JJ's call with Morgan's, and she told JJ about not being able to get ahold of Hotch. She tried Rossi, too, but also got his voicemail.

Morgan finally came back. "Hotch has been hurt he's in route to Detroit Medical center. They think Rossi's fine."

"They?" Garcia asked.

"One of the officers with Hotch is who called me." Morgan told them. They could hear him getting into a vehicle.

"Since you didn't say it, apparently Hotch is bad?" JJ asked as she and Reid also got in their SUV.

"He didn't say, but I could tell by his tone that it wasn't good," Morgan confessed. "We'll meet you there, JJ."

"Call me. . ." Garcia started as her eyes teared up.

"As soon as I know, Baby Girl," Morgan assured her.

"Be careful. I couldn't handle finding out if another one of my pretties got hurt," Garcia told them all.

"Thompson's gone," Blake told her.

"Good!" JJ, Reid, and Garcia all said at the same time.

"Tell him. . ." Garcia started again but couldn't bring herself to go on.

"I will," JJ told her and then they all hung up.

XXX

They all arrived at the same time and found Rossi in the waiting room. They took in his bloody hands and clothes and their fears were doubled.

"Rossi?" Morgan asked as they ran up to him.

"I don't know, we just got here." Rossi told them and Morgan led him over to a chair and sat him down. He didn't like the way Rossi looked like he was going to pass out. "He was seizing in the ambulance," Rossi told them, the fear evident in his voice.

"Oh my God!" JJ exclaimed and then looked Rossi over. "Are you alright?" JJ asked him just as concerned as Morgan was. She had never seen Rossi so distraught, but she knew how had bad it must have been from Rossi's expression.

Rossi waved a hand. "I'm fine," he told them through heavy breaths.

"What happened?" Reid asked him.

"We were in the container, and the next thing I knew Hotch was forcing me out of it and as far away from it as possible. Then it blew and threw us off our feet. Hotch landed on top of me, and when I finally got him off. . ." He took a deep breath and put his head in his hands.

"Dave, calm down," Morgan told him as he put his hand on the older man's shoulder.

Rossi nodded and sat back up. "I think the blast slammed his head into the other container, and he had a piece of metal sticking out of his side," he told them, and they could tell he was about to cry.

Reid shot JJ a look, they were both teared up, too. If Rossi was that upset, they knew it was bad.

"Come on. Let's go get you cleaned up," Morgan told him as he gently pulled Rossi into a standing position and walked him to the bathroom. Reid followed in case they needed help. JJ walked up to the nurses' station to see if she could get an update and give them information on Hotch. Apparently they hadn't asked Rossi for it yet. Blake sat down and put her head in her hands; her ears were still ringing.

XXX

Forty five minutes later, a doctor finally came out to give the team an update. "Mr. Hotchner is down in MRI as we speak. X-rays revealed a skull fracture, and we need to know how extensive the damage is. The metal that pierced his right side has caused internal injuries, and they will need to be fixed through surgery. Once we have an idea about how his head is, we will take him into surgery. I'm sorry I don't have anything more definite at this point, but I thought you all would like to know where we stand right now."

"Thank you," JJ answered for all of them.

Once the doctor left, they all stared at each other, and Rossi put his head in his hands and cried.

"Come on Rossi. This is Hotch were talking about, man. He'll be fine," Morgan tried to console him.

Rossi finally looked up at them. "He was protecting me. If he hadn't had done that, he would have gotten further away."

"You don't know that," Reid tried to reason with him.

"Yes I do. If he hadn't been so concerned about getting me out of the way, he would have been fine," Rossi told him coldly, and they knew not to argue with him anymore about it. They all knew how much Rossi cared for Hotch, and they also knew that when he shouldered guilt, it was extremely hard to get him out from under it.

JJ got up to step outside. Someone had to call Jessica and let her know what was going on, even if they didn't have any real news.

Morgan decided to follow her to give Garcia and Strauss an update, too. He gave Reid a look to tell him to keep an eye on Rossi. Reid nodded his understanding.

XXX

Another hour later, Rossi was up and pacing when a nurse came out and got them to take them to a consult room. They all eyed each other warily, none of them liking not being told what was happening in the waiting room. Even though there were several seats around the little room, they all chose to stand and wait for the doctor the nurse had promised would be right in. Two doctors finally came into the room, and no one liked the looks on their faces. Maybe to the average person they looked calm, but to a room full of profilers their facial expressions conveyed enough concern that Rossi felt his chest tighten. "Won't you have a seat?" The younger doctor from earlier asked. Rossi looked at the young faces around him, nodded, and sat down. The rest of the team followed suit and so did the doctors.

The older doctor introduced himself as Dr. Powell, a neurologist. "Agent Hotchner's MRI shows traumatic brain injury," he started as he focused on Rossi. Whether he focused on Rossi because he was the oldest, of whether it was because he could tell Rossi was the most upset, the team wasn't sure. "His brain is swelling; his prefrontal cortex and amygdalae have been damaged. If the swelling persists, we will have to perform a Ventriculostomy so the cerebrospinal fluid can be drained from inside the brain, helping to relieve the pressure." He paused to let that sink in. Rossi felt as though he couldn't breathe. "We will not know the extent of brain damage until he regains consciousness. Right now we have him on a ventilator to help regulate his oxygen intake because that will help with the brain swelling also." JJ gasped and turned away to face the wall. Reid put his hand on her shoulder to comfort her.

The younger doctor, Dr. Rexrode, then took up the narrative. "He is in surgery right now to take care of his internal injuries. The penetrating abdominal injury did damage his colon and his liver. Once they get the bleeding under control, they should have no trouble repairing the damage. He will also be put on a course of strong antibiotics to fight off any infection caused by peritonitis."

"We will know more once the surgery is done and he finally wakes up. The next twenty-four hours will be critical," Dr. Powell told them as he stood up. Dr. Rexrode stood up, too.

Morgan glanced at Rossi, when it was apparent that he wasn't going to speak, Morgan stood up to address the doctors. "So what do you think the overall prognosis is?"

The older doctor took a deep breath. "It is too soon to tell, but we will keep you posted." And the doctors left the agents to figure out what it all meant.

"Oh God!" Rossi said and put his head in his hands again. They could all tell he was crying.

JJ couldn't help herself either, she broke down, too, and Morgan pulled her into a hug and let her cry on his chest. He looked over her head at Reid. "What does all that brain mumbo jumbo mean?"

Reid winced. He had hoped none of them would ask him. "It's too soon to tell, Morgan. You heard the doctor."

Morgan wasn't letting him get away with that, though. "What does it mean, Reid!?" Rossi also looked at their resident genius.

Reid swallowed hard. "If he survives. . . I mean when he wakes up. . ." He sighed. He figured it was better to resort to the facts he knew he could rattle off. "The amygdalae have in two distinct roles and processes, emotional memory and the evaluation of emotional stimuli. Studies suggest that the amygdalae are important in interaction with fear stimuli. The prefrontal cortex is responsible for cognitive analysis and abstract thought, and the moderation of 'correct' behavior in social situations. The prefrontal cortex takes in information from all of the senses and orchestrates thoughts and actions to achieve specific goals."

They all heard Rossi's ragged breathing as his sobs got worse with Reid's explanations. Blake got up and put a hand on his shoulder. She wanted to tell him that Hotch would be fine, but she couldn't. They wouldn't know that until he woke up. _If he wakes up_, she thought darkly.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter 3**

Dr. Rexrode gave them an update and told them that Hotch made it through the surgery fine. Barring any infections, Hotch would recover from the surgery fully. The swelling on his brain had increased, and they did have to drill a hole in his skull to help relieve the pressure as they had been warned about. He was still not showing any signs of regaining consciousness. He ended the update by telling them as soon as Hotch was settled in ICU, they would be allowed to see him one person at a time. They all let Rossi go in first.

Rossi tentively walked up to the bed holding the man he thought of as a son. Hotch's pale body was exposed from the waist up. The newly stitched wound on his abdomen would eventually match the scars he had received from Foyet. Rossi winced, Hotch would not like to be so exposed, so he carefully pulled the sheet up to Hotch's shoulders. They could move it later if they wanted, but he knew Hotch would not want his team to see him without it. They had also stitched the gash in his forehead. Rossi was expecting Hotch's face to be swollen and bruised, but it was eerily pale instead. His eyes looked sunken, and Rossi shuddered because he actually looked dead. He reached under the sheet and pulled Hotch's hand out so he could hold it. He would have given anything for Hotch to return the simple gesture and squeeze his hand back, but there was no response.

Rossi took a shaky breath and a tear fell down his cheek. It was a horrible thing to see the strong man lying so helplessly in the bed hooked to so many different tubes and wires. "I'm here, Aaron," he told him, not sure if Hotch could hear him or not. Rossi couldn't see where the surgeons had drilled the hole in Hotch's skull so he assumed it was in the back of his head. Rossi sent up a silent prayer to God to watch over his friend and to help him recover. Suddenly Hotch's whole body started to jerk. Rossi laid a hand on Hotch's chest; he knew he was having another seizure, and he knew that was common, but it still hurt his heart. A nurse came up to check on him quickly, and it was over within moments. Rossi took another deep breath. "Why, Aaron? Why would you risk your life to save mine?" he asked the silent man. _Because he cares about you as much as you care about him, dumbass!_

He shook his head. "You have to get better, Aaron. I won't be able to live with myself if you don't." Rossi sighed and let a few more tears fall. Then he leaned down and gently kissed Hotch on the forehead. "Get well, my friend," he told him and set his hand down lightly so the other members of the team could visit their boss.

Rossi noticed that every one of the team emerged from ICU with tears in their eyes. They were not allowed to stay at the hospital since Hotch was in ICU, and with a promise to call if anything changed, Rossi finally conceded that they needed to leave. They made sure the ICU staff had Rossi's and Morgan's cell numbers and Rossi herded them all out to the SUVs. He wanted them all to get something to eat and then to go back to the hotel to get some rest.

XXX

After three days, Hotch was still in a coma, so Rossi arranged for Hotch to be taken home. The team had been in Detroit long enough, and Jack needed to see his father, even if he was just lying in a bed. The Bureau wanted Hotch flown to Walter Reed Hospital. While Rossi didn't have a problem personally with the hospital, Hotch was not in the military, and Rossi would be damned if he would allow Hotch to wake up there. So Rossi arranged for Hotch to be transferred to Reston Hospital Center in Reston, VA. They were known for their work with brain injuries and coma patients. The Bureau flat out refused to pay for the transportation, but Rossi took care of that personally, and the new hospital took the Bureau insurance, so everything worked out. They transported Hotch by helicopter and the team packed up and got on the jet to finally go home.

Rossi promised Hotch that he would be there as soon as he could, so he went in and closed the case files in record time. By the time he got to Reston, Hotch was settled into his new room in the coma care unit. There was a radio playing softly in the background. Rossi smiled as he search and found a classic rock station he thought Hotch would like. Then Rossi just sat holding Hotch's hand, but just like the last four days, Hotch didn't respond. Rossi sighed. He didn't like the way Hotch already seemed to have lost weight. He knew they were feeding him intravenously, but Hotch couldn't afford to lose much weight, there wasn't enough of him to start with. He knew the team, Jessica, and Jack were planning a visit for the next morning and Rossi prayed to God that being closer to home would have a positive influence on his wounded friend. He stayed with for a couple hours, but finally decided to go home. "I'll be back first thing in the morning, Aaron." He leaned down and gave him a kiss on the forehead.

XXX

The next morning, Rossi entered Hotch's room to find him lying in a different position. He wasn't sure if the staff had moved him or if Hotch had moved himself, but he was glad of the change. Anything was better than Hotch looking like he was lying in a coffin. He pulled up a chair, sat down, and grabbed Hotch's hand in what had become his usual way of spending his visits. Rossi started telling Hotch about how excited Mudgie was when he got home, and then went on to talk about anything that popped into his head. He couldn't stand the thought of just sitting there listening to all of the machines that Hotch was hooked up to. After about forty five minutes, Hotch's hand moved from Rossi's. Rossi froze, not sure if he imagined it or not. Then he noticed Hotch right foot move also. Rossi stood up quickly. "Aaron?" He waited several minutes, but Hotch didn't move again; and he started to wonder if he had actually had seen it.

Jessica brought Jack up first. They had talked to him and he knew his father wouldn't be awake, but Jack found comfort in actually being able to see and touch him. "Can he hear me, Uncle Dave?"

"I don't know for sure, but I'd like to think he can," Rossi told him with a small smile.

Apparently he liked the answer, and he spent the better part of the next hour telling Hotch all about school and everything he had missed while he was in Michigan. Jessica smiled sadly at the Hotchner men; she had confessed to Rossi that Jack had had a couple nightmares after he found out that Hotch was hurt. He had since come to the conclusion that his father would get better; he just needed a little time. After a while, Jessica told Jack that they had to go, but that they would stop by and see him after school the next day. Jack leaned in and gave his father a kiss on the cheek. "I love you, Daddy," Jack told him and they left.

Garcia and Morgan showed up next. She had never seen him while he was in the hospital after Foyet, so she had imagined all kinds of horrors in her mind about what he would look like. Seeing him, though, only made her think one thing; that he looked dead. Garcia couldn't hold back the tears for her Unit Chief. Morgan hugged her tightly until she had herself under control. She looked around the room as she wiped her eyes. "This place is dull. He needs color. He needs joy." She grabbed her purse and headed out the door. Rossi gave Morgan a small smile as he turned to follow her. They both knew she was headed to the gift shop.

Rossi took his normal place again, and JJ walked in. He stood up and gave her a hug. She pulled up another chair and sat opposite Rossi. "He's losing weight," she pointed out. Rossi nodded his agreement. "He can't afford to lose weight," she went on and Rossi smiled. "When's he gonna wake up, Dave?"

Rossi was about to answer when Hotch's right foot moved. He saw JJ's head snap to the movement, so he knew he wasn't the only one to see it. They watched in awe as Hotch flexed his foot and his toes pointed out instead of just pointing up limply. "Come on, Aaron. You can do it. We know you want to wake up," Rossi told him as he put his hand on Hotch's chest. He looked at JJ. "That's the second time he's done that," he told her with a smile.

"Come on, Hotch." JJ encouraged him. As if on cue, Hotch right hand pulled away from Dave's and moved out away from his body as his elbow moved closer to his side. "God! Does that mean he's in pain?" JJ asked desperately as she saw Hotch's arm flex.

A look of horror spread over Rossi's face. He had been so happy to see Hotch move, that he didn't think of any other reason for it other than he was waking up.

JJ saw Rossi's fear. "I'll go get a nurse," she said and quickly left the room.

Rossi tried to get Hotch's arm to relax, but it was too stiff to move. Rossi tried to swallow the lump building in his throat. He stepped back as a nurse came in with JJ. They watched the nurse check Hotch's arm and foot, and then checked his eyes. She turned to the agents with a smile.

"Is he in pain?" Rossi asked quickly.

"I don't think so. It means he is starting to wake up. On the Glasgow Scale, Aaron was at a three yesterday; that is the lowest a person can be with ones in all three subgroups: eye opening, verbal, and motor responses. This type of movement would give him a two in the motor response, but it still may be a while before he is actually what you would consider awake. Even at an eight, he would still be considered in a coma, but hopefully this is a good sign and it means he is starting his journey back to the world of consciousness," she told them with a smile as she notated it on Hotch's chart. She patted Rossi's shoulder as she walked past him and left the room.

JJ noticed Rossi's smile; it was the first time he had smiled since the explosion, and it infected her as she felt a smile cross her own lips.

"What?" Garcia asked anxiously when she saw their smiles as they turned to watch her come into the room.

JJ explained what the nurse had said to her and Morgan. "Bout time, Hotch," Morgan told his boss. They all assumed he could hear them.

JJ helped Garcia arrange the balloons and flowers she had bought. Garcia looked around the room when they were done. "Now it won't be so depressing when he wakes up," she told them with another smile.

"It's perfect, Kitten," Rossi told her as he pulled her into a hug.

They all watched as Hotch's left side reacted the same way as his right. Rossi walked up and put his hand on his chest. "Come on, Hotch. I know you hear us, and I know you want to give Garcia a scowl over all of the balloons."

Garcia laughed and put her hand on Hotch's arm. JJ put her hand on Hotch's left shoulder, and Morgan put his on Hotch's leg. They all willed Hotch to feel them and to know how much they cared about him.

XXX

Rossi couldn't go visit Hotch until after work the next day. Strauss had put them on standby, so they wouldn't be called out on a case; but there was still plenty of consults and paper work to do. He and Morgan had agreed to split up Hotch's work, and Rossi couldn't believe the amount of paper work Hotch had to do for every case. _And that's why I never wanted the position!_

It was almost seven by the time Rossi walked into Hotch's room. Rossi smiled as he realized Hotch was starting to show the next signs of motor response. After yesterday, he had went home and looked up all the information he could find on the subject. Hotch's right arm was curled up onto his chest, and Rossi suddenly worried about the sides of Hotch not responding at the same time. He hoped that didn't mean there was permanent damage to one side or the other of his brain. Rossi walked to Hotch's left side and grabbed Hotch's hand and sat down to tell him about all of the consults he had done when Hotch moaned. He wasn't sure if that meant Hotch was reaching the next level of verbal response of incomprehensible speech, but just hearing it made him smile. Hotch had been way too quiet, way too long.

Rossi noticed a card from Jack and smiled. Jack was taking the whole thing in stride. He was absolutely sure his father would be just fine as soon as he had enough time to rest. Rossi wished he could be as sure, but he had a nagging feeling in the pit of his stomach. He hoped it was just worry, but the little voice in his head laughed at that.

XXX

The next morning, Rossi went to visit Hotch before work. He walked in on the doctor examining him. Rossi was about to excuse himself, but the doctor smiled and told him he could stay. The doctor was checking Hotch's vitals and then went on to examine his body. Rossi smiled as he realized Hotch's left side had finally joined his right. Then the doctor took out a pointed pen type instrument and jabbed Hotch in the chest with it. Hotch's eyes opened, and Rossi's breath caught in his chest. Rossi knew it was the next stage in that part of the scale, but it was the first time he saw Hotch's eyes open, and it felt good. The doctor then poked Hotch's leg and Hotch's eyes responded again. He tried it on all of Hotch's limbs and it worked every time. "Aaron? Can you open your eyes for me?" The doctor asked him without poking him. "Open your eyes, Aaron."

Rossi watched with anticipation, but Hotch didn't respond. _Stop trying to rush him, Dave,_ he had to tell himself. He was happy with the little progress Hotch was making, and if he kept going the way he was, he would be awake by the end of the week. _Hopefully!_

The doctor finished his exam and Rossi pulled up a chair and took Hotch's hand. "I know you're trying Hotch, but I have to tell you that the waiting is killing me." He went on to tell him about what was happening around the BAU and in the world in general. After about an hour, he bid he friend goodbye and gave him a kiss to his forehead. He left with a promise to visit after work.

XXX

Reid decided to join Rossi for the evening visit. They grabbed dinner to go, and sat and ate in Hotch's room and talked to him like he was awake. It almost seemed real enough to make Rossi forget the bad feeling he had for a while. Reid started spewing off facts about coma patients, but Rossi tuned him out. He didn't want to hear about other patients, the only one he cared about at the moment was Hotch. Suddenly Hotch mumbled something. Reid stopped his iteration and looked at Hotch. Rossi smiled. _That's definitely incomprehensible speech!_ "I think he wants you to shut up," Rossi joked.

Rossi stood up to try something. "Hotch, open your eyes for me." Rossi almost jumped for joy as he watched Hotch's eyes flutter and then open. He leaned in to look him in the eyes, and he could tell there was no recognition in them yet. _Baby steps, Dave. Baby steps!_ Hotch slowly shut his eyes again.

"Open your eyes, Hotch." Reid tried, and sure enough Hotch opened his eyes again. Reid looked at Rossi and smiled. "The repetition of following commands is a great sign."

Rossi nodded. _By the end of the week definitely!_


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter 4**

Rossi tried to place his visit the next morning for the same time that he thought Hotch's doctor was going to be there. He did it perfectly. He walked in on the doctor using his pointed pen on Hotch right foot. Hotch didn't just open his eyes, he jerked away from the thing. Rossi smiled. _Keep it up, Hotch. You're doing great!_ When the doctor used it on his left foot, nothing happened. Rossi again worried about half of Hotch's brain being more damaged than the other. The doctor noticed his concern, though, and smiled. "It's perfectly normal for one side to be faster than the other. Even though a lot of it is theory, we believe in the right-brained left-brained aspect of the person. I would assume Aaron is more of a left-brained person."

"Definitely," Rossi told him with a smile. He knew about the studies, and everyone who knew him would say he was certainly a left-brained person.

Just then Hotch said something. Rossi smiled even more. They couldn't understand it, but it seemed like Hotch was trying to join in the conversations around him. Rossi went up to him and held his hand. "Open your eyes, Hotch." Hotch did to the raised brows of the doctor. "He did it twice last night," Rossi told the doctor proudly.

"He's moving along nicely. I wouldn't be surprised if he is actually consciously awake by the end of next week," the doctor told him. Hotch mumbled something. "Or this week," the doctor corrected himself with a smile. "Aaron," Hotch opened his eyes to the sound of his name. "What color is grass?" Hotch said one word, and Rossi thought it sounded like 'blue' but he couldn't be sure. The doctor looked at Rossi. "That's the next step. When he can answer questions when asked, and we can understand him, then it usually signals a few days left."

"But he got the answer wrong," Rossi told him worriedly.

"You heard 'blue', too? But don't worry about that. Just the fact of him answering is good. He'll eventually get the answers right. If you're going to try it, just pretend he gets the answers right, and praise him for it. If you try to tell him he is wrong, or try to correct him it will confuse him, and he'll be confused enough."

Rossi nodded his understanding, and the doctor made a few notes on his chart and left. Rossi pulled up his usual chair and sat there holding Hotch's hand. A Beatles song came on the radio and Hotch mumbled something. Rossi went and turned the radio up a little for him. "There, now you can hear it better, but I'll never understand you liking them. I could never stomach their songs." Hotch mumbled something that sounded like 'too bad,' and Rossi smiled.

A half hour later, Rossi headed to work. As soon as he got there, they got a case. He sat through the initial meeting. It wasn't too bad; someone had targeted a small company and they were threatening the employees. One person was already dead, and the small local police force asked for their help before someone else died. They already knew it was someone connected to the company, so when Rossi said he wasn't going with them, no one argued.

Morgan was actually glad. "We can't take the chance of Hotch waking up with all of us out of state."

"I agree. I'll put in for some personal time, but if you all need me, I'm just a call away," he told them seriously.

"Please, my lovelies could solve this one in their sleep," Garcia joked.

"Hotch could probably do it from his coma," JJ mused and everyone laughed.

Rossi saw the team off and went to Strauss with paperwork to take the next three days off. She agreed reluctantly, but he assured her that the team would be fine without him.

XXX

The team was back home in two days, and Hotch had made steady progress. He was actually reaching his hand up to stop the doctor from rubbing his knuckles on his sternum. The doctor called it 'purposeful movement' and it gave him a five in the motor response. With everything else he had been doing, Hotch now had an eleven on the scale. He was no longer considered to be in a coma, and Rossi was sure that Hotch would be awake soon. He couldn't wait; he couldn't believe how much he missed his friend. Rossi laughed when the doctor asked Hotch what his son's name was and he said 'ball'. Rossi knew Hotch was probably remembering Jack playing soccer, and while the doctor didn't get the connection, Rossi did.

XXX

The next day Rossi decided to have lunch with Hotch. He almost dropped the bag of food in his hand when he walked into the room and Hotch looked at him. Hotch actually looked at him. His eyes followed Rossi into the room, and Rossi was sure he recognized him. "Well, hey there," Rossi told him with a smile. Hotch's face went from passive to his famous Hotch stare. Rossi's heart skipped a beat. _Maybe he doesn't recognize me._ "Hotch? How are you?"

Hotch's brows furrowed as if he was trying to figure out what to say, but then he closed his eyes.

Rossi stood there another moment and realized that Hotch had fallen back into unconsciousness as his face relaxed. Rossi sighed. He knew Hotch would wake up a little at a time, and a little more each time, but he didn't like the look Hotch had given him. Rossi tried to shake it off, to know it probably meant nothing more than Hotch reverting to his usual work face, but the little voice in his head was laughing again.

XXX

The next day, Rossi walked in on the doctor asking Hotch how he felt. Rossi noticed that Hotch was awake but his face looked passive. Hotch didn't try to answer him. "Can you squeeze my hand?" the doctor asked him, and Rossi smiled when he realized Hotch did it. "Good," the doctor told him and put Hotch's left hand back of the bed. "Can you give me a thumbs-up with your right hand?" Hotch did that, too. "Good job."

Rossi entered into the room fully. The doctor smiled at him and waved him over. Hotch looked at him when he got into Hotch's peripheral vision. Rossi was relieved when Hotch didn't give him his stare; his face stayed passive.

"Do you know who this is?" the doctor asked him.

Hotch nodded but didn't say anything.

"Do you know his name?" the doctor asked.

Hotch's brow furrowed. "Reid. . . no. . . " he closed him eyes.

"It's alright, Aaron," Rossi tried to tell him.

Hotch opened his eyes again. "Rossi."

Rossi smiled.

"That's right," the doctor told him and Hotch looked back at Rossi for a second and then closed his eyes.

"Don't be surprised if he doesn't know you every time," the doctor told him.

"I understand," Rossi assured him.

The doctor finished up and Rossi took his usual spot. As long as Hotch continued to follow commands with his movements, he reached as far as he could on the motor scale. Rossi also thought that he had reached as far as he could on the eye scale, even though he didn't keep them open for very long. Hotch had only one more step to go on the verbal scale, and if Rossi knew his friend, that wouldn't take very long. Rossi knew the hardest thing Hotch was facing was the fact of getting strong enough to stay awake and eventually get out of the hospital. Rossi squeezed his hand and smiled when Hotch returned the gesture.

After about twenty minutes, Hotch woke up again. Rossi stood up to be in Hotch's view. "Hey there," Rossi told him with a smile.

"Where am I?" Hotch asked weakly.

"You're in the hospital."

"Why?"

"You don't remember?"

"I wouldn't have asked if I knew," Hotch told him coldly.

Rossi gave him a strange look. "Sorry, there was an explosion," Rossi started but Hotch faded off again.

Hotch didn't wake up again before Rossi had to leave. Rossi drove to work telling himself that Hotch's tone was due to his confusion, but the laughter in his head didn't want to be ignored. _He's fine! He will be fine!_ Rossi tried to tell himself despite the laughter from his little voice.

XXX

Jessica called Rossi that evening at work. "Something wrong with Aaron," she told him as soon as he answered.

Rossi's heart skipped a beat. "What?"

"He woke up and. . . "

"What Jessica? You know that he might not have recognized you or Jack."

"No, that's not it."

"Then what? What happened?" Rossi asked her full of concern.

"I don't know how to say it. It's just he didn't seem right. I don't know, but Jack noticed it, too."

"It will take him time to be right, Jess. He needs time to process everything."

She sighed heavily. "I know. I'm sorry to have worried you."

"Why don't you give it another day or so before you take Jack back up there. Give Hotch a little more time. I'm sure he wouldn't want to be confusing Jack."

"Yeah, that sounds good. Jack will understand that his father needs rest. Just call me when you think it will be alright for Jack to go back up there."

"I will, and don't worry. He'll be fine."

Rossi ended the call and the laugh got louder. He hurried through the rest of his work and left to see Hotch as soon as he was done. Rossi noticed that Hotch's bed had been adjusted to where he was almost sitting up. Hotch woke up when Rossi pulled the chair close to the bed to sit down.

"Where am I?" Hotch asked, his voice a little stronger than it was that morning.

Rossi didn't like the way he kept asking the same question. "Hospital." Hotch nodded and looked around the room. His gaze finally settled on Rossi. "How do you feel?"

"Headache."

"You need something?"

"Why?"

"To help with the headache," Rossi explained.

Hotch looked at him coldly. "Why am I in the hospital?"

"Oh, sorry. An explosion."

"When?"

Rossi had to think about that. "Twelve days ago."

Hotch fixed him with his famous stare for a few moments but went back to sleep.

_Give him time, Dave. He'll be fine_. Rossi tried to give himself the same advice that he had given Jessica. The little voice wasn't laughing anymore. It flat out told him, 'yeah right!' Rossi put his head in his hands and for the first time in a while, he cried. Something was wrong with his friend and it was all his fault.

XXX

Rossi didn't make it to see Hotch before work, so he decided a lunch visit would be nice. The whole team decided to join him. Rossi hung back and let them all enter first. He wanted to watch Hotch's interaction with them, so he could gauge if Hotch was acting the same way with everyone. Rossi watched as Hotch looked at his team. It was the first time he had seen them all since he had woken up. Hotch was eyeing them all with his stare. Reid actually took a step backward. "How ya feeling, man?" Morgan asked with a smile.

"Why are you all here?"

"We wanted to see you," JJ told him with a smile.

"Shouldn't you be working?"

"Lunch break," Reid pointed out. Hotch fixed his stare on him, and Reid swallowed hard.

The whole team exchanged worried glances, and they all looked to Rossi for help. Rossi took a deep breath and got closer to Hotch. Hotch turned his stare at him, but Rossi ignored it. "Do you know where you are?"

"A hospital, obviously," Hotch told him sarcastically.

Reid shot Rossi a look; Hotch was never sarcastic unless he was with an unsub or joking with them. Rossi ignored that, too. "Do you know why?"

Hotch lost his stare and he actually looked confused. They could tell he was trying to remember. "No," he finally admitted.

"That's alright. You may never remember it," Reid pointed out, a little braver since Hotch wasn't staring at him anymore. The whole team heard him gulp when Hotch fixed him with his stare again.

"And what would 'it' be, Reid?"

Reid looked at Rossi again. "There was an explosion," Rossi told him, again.

Hotch laid his head back and closed his eyes. They knew he wasn't asleep. They all exchanged looks again. Apparently Hotch wasn't in the mood for visitors. Rossi nodded toward the door and they all started to leave.

"We'll see you later, Hotch," Rossi told him, but Hotch didn't respond.

On the way back to the BAU, they all discussed Hotch's unusual behavior. Rossi also brought up how Hotch kept asking the same questions. Reid assured them that it was normal. "It's called PTA, Post Traumatic Amnesia, and it should work itself out in a few days, but it could last for a few weeks."

"Well, then no wonder he's mad. He wakes up in a hospital and doesn't know why he's there. Hell, I'd be pissed, too," Morgan told them. They all agreed, but Rossi felt it was something more. _I'll just have to wait until this stage is over to be sure_. Rossi sent up a prayer to God, for it to be that simple.

"I don't think I could handle it if Hotch kept using his stare on us. It's fine for an unsub, it does a good job on them, but it made my blood run cold for it to be aimed at us," JJ admitted.

Reid let out a weak chuckle. "I'm glad it wasn't just me who had a problem with it."

"I think it actually stopped my heart for a couple of beats," Blake told them and they all laughed.


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter 5**

The next couple of days went about the same. Hotch couldn't remember anything from one day to the next, and no matter what Reid or the doctor said, it still worried Rossi. Hotch had also continued to be in a foul mood. Rossi couldn't blame him, but it was hard on everyone who witnessed it. Rossi had told Jessica to keep Jack away because he wasn't sure how Hotch would be with him, so it was better to be safe than sorry. Rossi had to remind himself that Hotch didn't remember being awake, so when he didn't ask about Jack, it was because he thought he had just woken up, and not that he had gone several days without seeing his son.

One good thing was that Hotch was staying awake longer. The doctor said that once Hotch could stay awake for at least two hours, then they would start rehab on him. Rossi silently wished that would happen soon because he thought that would help Hotch get over the amnesia. Everyone else on the team had all but stopped going to see Hotch because they couldn't handle seeing him the way he was.

Rossi had talked to Strauss and after he threatened to take a leave of absence, she put him on stand down. He had to handle all of the consults and all of Hotch's paperwork, but he didn't have to go out on cases. He, of course, promised the team that if they needed him, he would join them. So far they hadn't needed his help, and Rossi got in the habit of stopping in to visit Hotch three times a day: once before going to work, a quick visit at lunch, and again on his way home.

Hotch was awake when Rossi got there at lunch. He eyed Rossi warily. "What's wrong?" Rossi asked him.

"You mean other than being blown up and being in the hospital? That's not enough?"

Rossi was surprised. Either someone else had told Hotch what had happened, or he had remembered from the previous day. Hotch's tone was almost normal, too. Rossi smiled. "I'd say that's plenty. Are you in pain?"

Hotch reached up and pinched the bridge of his nose, and Rossi smiled again at the usual Hotch move. "Just a headache. I can't seem to get it to go away."

"Do you want something for it?"

The stare was back. "I think I'm capable of asking for something if I think I need it, Dave."

"Sorry. I didn't mean to imply you weren't."

Hotch's stare softened a little.

"Do you remember me being here yesterday?"

"Yes, and this morning."

That shocked Rossi, he hadn't thought Hotch was even awake. "How long have you been awake?"

"I don't know. What difference does it make?" Hotch asked him in a harsh tone.

Rossi chose to ignore it. Hotch needed to know what he had to do to get better. "Because once you're awake for at least two full hours then you can start on rehab and work toward getting yourself out of here."

"Rehab? How long have I been here?"

"This is the sixteenth day."

Hotch looked shocked. He looked out the window. "Are we still in Michigan?"

"No. They brought you home after four days there. You're in Reston."

Hotch fixed him with his stare again. "Then why hasn't Jack been up here?"

Rossi thought that Hotch didn't believe him. "He has been many times, just not yesterday or today. You weren't remembering anything from day to day."

"And there's a reason he wasn't here yesterday?"

Even recovering from a brain injury and a coma, Hotch was still profiling him. Rossi smiled mentally because he knew his friend's brain was alright. "You've been in a bad mood, and it scared him."

Hotch looked shocked for a second, but the stare returned and deepened and Rossi had to fight the urge to take a step back. "What do you mean, scared him?"

"With that," Rossi told him gesturing to Hotch's face. "You been giving everyone your stare, and it scared Jack."

"What stare?" he asked, still using it.

"The one that's on your face right now. The one you used to reserve only for unsubs." Rossi was scared; he didn't think Hotch had any idea what he was talking about. "Relax your eyes and forehead, Aaron." Rossi almost laughed as he watched as Hotch tried, but it seemed like he couldn't. Finally he rubbed a hand down his face.

"Better?"

"A little," Rossi said tentatively.

Hotch rolled his eyes. "Well, if I did, I didn't mean to."

"He knows that," Rossi started and realized the stare was back. "What emotion are you feeling right now, Aaron?"

Hotch eyed him coldly. "I don't want to play your game, Dave."

"It not a game, and if we can't figure out what is going on with you, then you're gonna have a hard time controlling yourself for Jack." Rossi told him forcibly.

That made Hotch stop and consider, but he just closed his eyes and leaned back against his pillow.

"Aaron, please, talk to me."

Hotch took a deep breath. "My head hurts, Dave. I don't feel like talking," Hotch told him without even opening his eyes.

"Have you told the doctor about it?"

"No."

"If you won't, I will."

"Whatever."

Rossi frowned at that. Hotch would never have ended a conversation like that before, and it bothered Rossi more than he wanted to admit. He patted Hotch on the arm and went to go find Hotch's doctor.

Hotch doctor assured Rossi that a headache after the trauma Hotch had went through was normal, but he promised to give Hotch something for it, and Rossi thanked him and promised to be back later.

XXX

On the way to visit Hotch that evening, Rossi vowed that if Hotch still remembered everything the next day, then he would bring Jack up to see him. He prayed that whatever the doctor gave him would help, and that Hotch's mood was just due to pain. A nurse stopped Rossi before he could get into Hotch's room. She told him that Hotch spent most of the afternoon awake, and that they had removed his feeding tube. They wanted to see if Hotch would eat, but Hotch had yet to touch any of the food they had provided, and she wanted Rossi help to see if he could get him to eat. He told her he would try, and she thanked him with a small smile.

Hotch was laying back with his hands behind his head when Rossi went into his room. Rossi smiled as he looked at the food they had wanted Hotch to eat; it was all liquids. _The poor man needs some steak and some pasta_.

Hotch opened his eyes and looked at Rossi as he pulled up a chair next to him and sat down.

Rossi noticed him looking, and he was glad he didn't see the stare. "Nurse says you need to eat, Hotch."

Hotch gave him a disgusted look. "You eat the shit. I'm not." Rossi almost laughed. "I'll wait until I get home and eat some real food."

"You won't get to go home if you're not strong enough," Rossi told him as he got up and grabbed the bowl of broth. Hotch watched him take it to the bathroom and pour most of it in the toilet. Then he did the dame with the runny applesauce. "If they think you're eating this, then they'll change you to solid food at least," Rossi told him with a smile.

Hotch actually smiled. "Thanks."

Rossi's heart skipped a beat at Hotch's smile. "How's the head?"

"A hell of a lot better than it was."

"Good."

"Do you remember what happened?"

Hotch closed his eyes for a moment while he tried to recall his last case. He finally looked at Rossi again. "The last thing I remember is Garcia telling us about the property and storage rooms." Rossi went ahead and told him about everything that happened. "Nobody else got hurt?"

"No."

"Good."

XXX

The next morning, Hotch did remember, and Rossi promised to bring Jack up that evening. After disposing of Hotch's breakfast, Rossi stayed a few more minutes but told Hotch he would be back around five. The doctor stopped Rossi in the hall and told him they were going to try and get Hotch up and moving. Rossi smiled as he made his way to work. The team was on their way to Rode Island for a case, so Rossi worked quickly and actually got done about four. He went and picked up Jack.

Rossi was glad to see Hotch's smile for Jack. Rossi stayed back and let Hotch visit with his son. He saw Hotch trying to keep his stare off his face, and it worried him. It was almost like the stare was trying to become Hotch's normal expression. He also noticed that Hotch kept having to stop himself from cussing. Hotch was never one to cuss all the time, and Rossi realized that he had cussed the night before, too. Rossi shook his head. _Maybe his headache is back and he can't focus_. The nagging in the pit of his stomach and the little voice in his head disagreed. He wasn't sure what was happening to his friend, but he vowed to get to the bottom of it. He decided to talk with Hotch's doctor about it.

Jack laughed at something, and Rossi was glad Hotch was making an effort to keep his son from being afraid. After about an hour, the Hotch stare was starting to show, and Rossi told Jack that it was time to go. Jack kissed and hugged his father goodbye, and Rossi told Hotch that he would see him in the morning.

On the way to Jessica's, Rossi explained to Jack about Hotch's headaches. Jack understood and told him he was fine, that he could tell his father was getting better. Rossi walked Jack to the door and then Rossi gave Jessica an update. She said she would take Jack back up the next day after school. Rossi bid her goodbye and went home to do some research.

_No, not Aaron_, Rossi thought as he read over the words on his computer screen: even a minor traumatic brain injury can cause changes in personality and emotions, either temporary or permanent. _My God, I hope it's temporary_. Rossi went on to read about how changes in personality can lead to changes in relationships, jobs, friends, and depression because the hurt person doesn't understand why he is being treated differently. They don't realize that they are different and don't know how to act like their old self because they think they are their old self. _Shit! So he's acting stranger because we're acting strange. Why, God? Couldn't him getting hurt and almost dying be enough?_ Rossi felt anger like he never had. Aaron was of the best people he had ever met. The man was good in every sense of the word: a good man, a good father, a good friend, a good profiler, a god human being. Rossi didn't know what to think if the 'good' in Hotch was gone. _NO! Hotch is still good, damn it!_ Rossi turned off his computer and went to bed after downing a glass of scotch. _The Aaron I know and love is not gone!_

XXX

After five days, Hotch was ready to go home. Rossi noticed that Hotch was more Hotch-like every day, and he breathed a sigh of relief. He also noticed, though, that when his head was hurting the 'mean Hotch', as he was starting to call it, would show up. Hotch had never had a problem handling pain before, and it scared Rossi to think that Hotch may have to fight the headaches for the rest of his life. Rossi also noticed Hotch studying him more, like he was gauging how to act based on how Rossi was acting. Hotch was a very intelligent man, and Rossi was worried that it wasn't just the headaches, but that Hotch was smart enough to fake his way into fooling Rossi that he was still the old Hotch. Rossi wasn't sure of anything anymore when it came to Hotch.

Rossi mentioned that the team wanted to come by his house to welcome him home, but Hotch flat out refused. He didn't want attention. While that wasn't new, the old Hotch would have gracefully accepted it. Rossi bit his lip as he drove his friend home. "Alright, Aaron, but you must understand that they care about you. They just want to know you're home and doing well."

"I'm sure you can handle telling them that." Hotch studied Rossi face. "Maybe once I'm more up to par," Hotch added when he saw the concern Rossi was trying hard to hide.

Rossi nodded. "Jessica is staying with you?"

"No."

"Do you think it's best to be alone right now?"

"I think I know what's best for me, Dave."

"I'm not saying you don't. I'm just worried you'll need help with something and no one will be there to help."

"What would I possibly need help with? I may be a little weaker than before this all started, but I'm not helpless."

"Is Jack coming home today?"

"No."

Rossi could tell Hotch was getting mad, so he let it drop. Maybe some time alone might help him sort things out. They pulled into Hotch driveway and Hotch got out and went to his door without another word. Rossi sighed heavily. Hotch may have been closed off to most people, but he always opened up to Rossi before. Rossi carried Hotch bag inside for him. "You want me to stay?"

Hotch's look told him he didn't, but he shrugged and turned to go into the house. Rossi shook his head. Rossi went into the kitchen and smiled as he realized someone had stocked Hotch's fridge with meals for Hotch to warm up. Rossi figured it was Garcia from the colorful labels that were attached to the containers. Rossi went into the living room and found Hotch pouring himself a drink. "Do you think that's wise?"

Hotch sat the bottle down roughly and closed his eyes and then fixed Rossi with his stare. "Are you going to second guess every damn thing I do?"

"I will if I think I need to." Hotch huffed. "Aaron, you're on pain meds. You're not supposed to drink with them."

"Maybe they aren't enough." Hotch told him harshly and picked up the glass of scotch and walked over to his couch and sat down.

_And enter, mean Hotch._ Rossi followed Hotch to the couch. "Is it just your head?"

"Yes," Hotch told him without looking at him.

"How long has the medicine not helped?"

"For a couple of days."

"Why didn't you talk to your doctor about it?"

Hotch took a long drink of the scotch and didn't answer him.

"If it's not helping, there's got to be something else they could try."

"Just go, Dave. I don't need a babysitter."

Rossi looked at his friend, bit his lip, and sighed. "Alright, Aaron. I'll be back tomorrow after work."

Hotch just sat there. Rossi shook his head and let himself out.


	6. Chapter 6

**Chapter 6**

Rossi vowed on his way home to call Hotch's doctor the next day. If the headaches were making him 'mean Hotch' then he wouldn't stop until Hotch had something that worked. _If this is temporary, please God, let it end sooner rather than later._

After talking to the doctor, Rossi had a new medicine to pick up for Hotch. The team was disappointed when Rossi said Hotch didn't want them to come over yet, but Rossi assured them that once Hotch got things straightened out, Rossi would tell them. Rossi knew they were all worried about Hotch, he was, too, but he couldn't push too hard yet because he was afraid of him shutting him out completely.

Rossi had also talked to Jessica and she agreed to keep Jack until Rossi decided it would be alright for him to go home. That thought scared Rossi. He would have never have thought that he would ever have to worry about Jack being around Hotch, and it made his guilt over the whole thing become even worse.

XXX

Rossi was floored when he showed up that evening and Hotch was sitting on the couch in the same place as when Rossi had left the night before. He realized Hotch hadn't even changed his clothes from the day before. He didn't think Hotch had even been asleep. He even wondered if Hotch had even moved from the spot. "Hotch?" Rossi asked as he went into the living room.

"What?" Hotch asked without even looking at him.

"What are you doing?" The TV wasn't on and neither was the radio.

"Thinking."

"About what?"

"Nothing. Everything."

Rossi sat down in the chair opposite the couch. "Have you been there since last night?"

"Yep."

"You're not tired?"

"I slept off and on."

"Why didn't you go to bed?"

"Didn't feel like it."

Rossi swallowed hard. Hotch wasn't exactly being mean, but his detached behavior was scary, too. "Is your head hurting?"

"Yes."

"Your doctor had me pick you up something new. You want to try it?"

"I don't care."

Rossi got up and got the pills and a glass of water. On his way back into the living room, Rossi noticed that Hotch's bottle of scotch was empty. He sighed deeply. He didn't think Hotch was drunk, but he wasn't sure he would know anymore. He handed Hotch the pills and the water.

Hotch took it and set the glass down on the coffee table. "Happy now?"

That stung. "Yes."

Hotch sighed heavily. "Why are you here, Dave?"

"I'm worried about you, Aaron. I think after as long as we've known each other I deserve that right."

"You just going to set there and watch me sit here?"

"No. I'd like to see you actually get up and do something."

"Like what?"

"Oh, I don't know, maybe eat something, watch TV, go to bed, anything besides just sitting here in the silence."

Hotch reached out, grabbed the remote, and turned the TV on.

Rossi was sure Hotch wanted to say 'happy now' again. "Aaron, talk to me."

"Make up your mind. Do you want to talk or do you want to watch TV?"

Rossi took a deep breath. _He doesn't realize how big of an ass he's being. Just let it slide._ When Rossi didn't answer him, Hotch gave him a look that said 'well?', and that did it. "I don't want to do either one. I want you to want to do it."

"Maybe I don't want to do anything. Ever consider that?"

"Why?"

Hotch just shook his head. "Fine! You want me to go to fucking bed? Fine! I'll fucking go to bed!" Hotch yelled and stormed down the hallway and slammed his bedroom door.

A tear escaped Rossi's eye as he watched his best friend become a man he didn't know. He sighed heavily and got up to go get his go bag out of his car. He was not about to let Hotch stay alone again after that.

XXX

Rossi woke up to sounds in the kitchen. He got up and realized that Hotch had showered, shaved, and actually looked decent. "Coffee?" Hotch asked as he grabbed a mug out of the cabinet.

"Please. How's the headache?"

"Not bad. How's the back?" Rossi gave him a puzzled look. "I have slept on that couch a few times, Dave."

Rossi smiled. "It was alright." Hotch handed him the mug, and Rossi accepted it with another smile.

"What?"

"What?"

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"Sorry, I didn't know I was looking at you a certain way. Damn, Aaron, I just woke up," Rossi tried to cover.

Hotch eyed him warily, but took his coffee and went and sat the table. Rossi followed him. Since he seemed to be in a decent mood, Rossi decided to take advantage of it. "How long do you think you'll need before you come back to work?"

Hotch looked at his watch, and Rossi knew he was checking to see what day it was. "I would hope to be back Monday."

Five days. "What do you have to do to be cleared to work?"

"I haven't check yet, but I'm sure it will require the doctor's approval. I'll have to call Strauss."

Rossi nodded. "You call Jessica yet?"

"Not yet. I figured I better give myself another day to make sure I'm ready for Jack."

Rossi nodded again. _This is the Aaron I know._ "What are your plans for today?"

"I'm going to go for a walk to try and judge where I am physically, first."

"Sounds good. Have you taken your pills this morning?"

"Yes, Dave. It says every eight hours."

Rossi smiled. Maybe it is just the headaches. "Did the doctor say when he thought the headaches would go away?"

"He said there was no way to tell. I could have them for the rest of my life."

"Hotch, I am so sorry." Rossi started to break down. "If you hadn't been so concerned about getting me out of that damn container, you wouldn't have been hurt." Rossi told him as his eyes watered up.

"You don't know that. That was Thompson's fault, not yours. Damn, Dave, if all I have to worry about is a headache or taking a pill, then I consider myself lucky. It could have been a lot worse."

"I guess."

"And you can stop blaming yourself. Guilt doesn't do anyone any good."

XXX

That night and the next day found Hotch to still be in decent mood; not quite the same old Hotch, but as close as he had been since the explosion. Rossi asked him if the team could come over as he said yes. Rossi noticed that Hotch seemed a little more reserved around them. He also noticed Hotch studying them, and Rossi had to again wonder if Hotch was just profiling everyone around him and masking the way he really felt. Rossi shook his head. _How can you even think that? Because old Aaron wouldn't have to profile his friends, he would just be normal_. He wasn't what normal was for Hotch anymore.

He was glad that he hadn't seen the stare for over 24 hours, though, and he decided that he would be happy with what he got. This Hotch was at least a thousand times better than mean Hotch. Rossi also knew the team sensed a change in Hotch, but they were covering decently. The evening came and went without any problems, and Rossi called Jessica and told her Jack could come home the next day after school. Rossi promised to check in on them.

Rossi stopped by after work the next day and found Hotch and Jack doing fine. "How's it going?" Rossi asked him.

Hotch looked up from the file he had been reading, apparently he had been to the BAU. Rossi was surprised he hadn't seen him there. "Fine."

"What did you find out from Strauss?" Rossi asked as he joined Hotch at the table.

"That I need to pass a physical."

"That should be easy enough, don't you think?"

"Yes, I actually made two miles on my run this morning."

Rossi raised his brows in surprise. "Damn, that's great, Hotch."

"It's a start."

"So you think you'll be back on Monday?"

"If I can get in to get my physical tomorrow, yes."

"The team got a case this morning."

"And yet, you are here."

Oops, apparently Hotch didn't like that. "I talked with Strauss."

"I know. I assured her that you would also be back to work in full capacity Monday."

"Yep."

Hotch shut the file he was looking at and fixed Rossi with the stare. _Shit!_ "I don't need a babysitter, Dave."

"I never said you did."

"And yet, you are here," Hotch told him again.

"What? Can't a guy stop by and visit a friend?"

Hotch eyed him a little more, but he finally relaxed his gaze and looked away. Rossi let out the breath he'd been holding.

"It's bed time, Jack." Hotch told him. Jack put up the book he'd been reading and went to his room to get ready.

Rossi wasn't sure, but he didn't think Jack looked quite right. "I'm gonna tell him goodnight," Rossi told Hotch and went to Jack's room. "How's it going?"

Jack sat on his bed and looked at Rossi. "It's ok, I guess."

"Just ok?"

"Yeah. Daddy seems different."

Rossi sat down next to him and put his arm around the boy he thought of as a grandson. "What do you mean?"

"He hasn't called me Buddy since he's woke up, and he's just. . . different."

"Has he scared you?"

"No."

"Tell you what, Buddy. Give Daddy a little more time; he'll came around."

Rossi could tell by Jack look that he wasn't sure whether to believe him or not. "Ok, Uncle Dave."

"You call me any time you need me, even if you just want to talk or want to say goodnight, anything."

"Ok."

"You know my number, right?"

Jack recited it to him with a smile.

"That's right. Give your Uncle Dave a hug." Jack embraced him and then Rossi got up to let him get in bed. "I'll tell Daddy you're ready."

"Ok, goodnight."

"Goodnight, Buddy."

Rossi went out and Hotch went in and then joined Rossi at the table again. Rossi could tell Hotch wasn't in a talkative mood, so he sighed and told him goodnight, too, and left.


	7. Chapter 7

**Chapter 7**

Hotch passed his physical with ease and everyone knew he would be back to work on Monday morning. Rossi entered the bullpen and noticed everyone else was early, too. Apparently they all wanted to welcome their boss back. Rossi went to his office and everyone else was gathered around the desks on the main floor. Rossi saw them all stop talking suddenly and turn towards the glass doors. When he saw their looks of shock and a couple mouths actually hanging open, Rossi quickly got up and walked to his door. There was Hotch strolling in and headed to his office. Rossi was just as shocked as the team was. Hotch was not wearing his usual suit and tie. He was wearing a pair of black jeans, a charcoal gray v-neck shirt over a white t-shirt, and a pair of black casual shoes. He was walking across the cat walk when he felt everyone's eyes on him. He stopped and looked at them. "What?" he asked as he put his hands out to the side.

They all looked away with mumbles of 'nothing' or 'sorry' and pretended to be interested in doing their work. Garcia did an about face and went quickly to her office. Hotch shook his head and continued to his office. As soon as his door was shut, everyone looked at Rossi. Rossi sighed deeply and went back into his office.

"Has he ever come to the office in anything but a suit?" JJ asked them quietly.

They all look to Reid for the answer. "Other than when we've been called in on short notice, no, he has always worn a suit."

"I didn't even think he owned regular clothes," Blake told them.

At their 9:00 meeting for the new case, they found out they were going to up state NY. There was someone killing the local kids, and time was of the essence.

"Wheels up in fifteen," Hotch told them, grabbed his tablet and headed out the door.

"Well, he seems ok," JJ voiced as she stood up.

"Yeah, but did you see him clinch his fists when Garcia displayed the victims?" Morgan asked.

"Cases involving kids have always upset Hotch," Reid pointed out.

They all looked to Rossi. "Go get ready," he told them, not really sure what they wanted from him.

XXX

Within two days, they knew who their unsub was, but they had no evidence to actually prove it. The local detective was holding the man for seventy two hours like the law allowed, but time was slowly ticking away. They had five dead kids, and their killer might have to be set free, and they were all angry. Rossi was worried about Hotch, but he actually seemed calmer than the rest of the team, like was the norm from before. Everyone had tried to break the man, but he just wasn't budging. After Morgan got into a yelling match with him and got nowhere, Rossi decided to take Morgan outside to calm him down and left Reid with Mr. Hanson, their unsub, in the interrogation room.

Everyone was tired from lack of sleep and exhaustion, so almost everyone went out to be with Rossi and Morgan.

Reid came out about ten minutes later. Morgan looked back towards the door then back to Reid. "Where's Hotch?"

"He told me to take a break," Reid told them.

Morgan shot Rossi a look and they both went running inside. They got to the interrogation room and found Hotch standing over Hanson. Hanson was crouched in a corner crying.

"Hotch!" Morgan yelled as he entered the room.

Hotch turned around slowly and fixed Morgan and Rossi with a look. "He confessed," he told them with an almost smile and left the room.

Morgan shot Rossi another look as Hanson stood up. They could both see what had happened to the man. Morgan shook his head and went after Hotch. Rossi followed closely behind him. They caught up to Hotch in the station's locker room.

"Hotch!" Morgan yelled again. Hotch turned to him completely calm. "What the hell did you do to him, Hotch?"

"I didn't touch him. Watch the tape."

"You scared him into pissing his pants, Hotch!"

"He confessed didn't he?"

"Yeah, but we don't do things like that!" Rossi could tell by 'we' Morgan was meaning 'you'. The rest of the team had come into the room to check on them.

Hotch advance on Morgan and stopped about a foot away from him. "Really? What about 'Turn off the tape and give me ten minutes with him, Hotch' or 'Fifteen minutes alone with him, Hotch, and we'll know where there are'?" Hotch mimicked Morgan's facial, head, and shoulder movements perfectly as he feed Morgan's words from previous cases back to him. "Whose words are they?"

Morgan just stood there, clenching and unclenching his teeth.

"That's what I thought!" Hotch told him and left the room; the team parted to allow him to leave.

Morgan ran a hand over his bald head. "That's not Hotch!" he yelled as he pointed towards the man who just left. He turned and punched a locker. Then he kicked them then he slammed both fists up and hit them and let his head rest on them under his hands. The rest of the team looked at Rossi and he nodded for them to go.

Rossi sighed deeply and put his hand on Morgan's shoulder. "Morgan," he said as he pulled him away from the lockers.

Morgan had tears slowly running down his cheeks. "I want the old Hotch back."

"I know, Derek," Rossi told him and pulled him into a hug. "I know."

XXX

Rossi found the girls and Reid watching the tape of the interrogation room. They watched as Hotch sat down as Reid left and they watched as Hotch kept leaning closer and closer to Hanson. Hanson eventually jumped up and yelled at Hotch and Hotch advanced on him just inches away from his face. Hanson slowly backed up and Hotch stayed with him. As Hanson slowly slid down the wall Hotch still stayed with him and he clearly yelled out his confession.

"He never touched him," JJ told them.

"That guy is awesome! I wish we had him here for all of the bad ones," the detective told them with a smile. He was clearly in awe of Hotch.

"Yeah, he's one in a million," Blake told him and they all left the little room.

Rossi lingered a minute, his eyes on the frozen image of Hotch. He wouldn't bet his life on it, but the look on Hotch's face looked like he was enjoying scaring the man in front of him. Rossi shook his head and went to find the team.

XXX

The jet ride home was a silent one, and Hotch sat in the back alone. Morgan had his headphones on and was listening to his music. Rossi thought about going and sitting with Hotch but he didn't want to confront him in front of the team so he sat and just quietly watched him.

The next couple of days went by without a case. Hotch was cordial with them all, but they could all sense a rift growing between them and their boss. Rossi sat in his office trying to figure out what to do. He had seen Hotch's knuckles bruised and cut, but when he asked Hotch about, Hotch said he scraped them on the driveway while he was playing basketball with Jack.

Three cases later, and Hotch's presence and power had impressed everyone they had worked with. It was like he had turned into a super FBI agent. The team wasn't impressed, though, as he pushed them farther and farther away. He was basically handling the cases on his own, and was intimidating every unsub without seeming to. Rossi didn't know what to do. He had tried talking to him about it, but Hotch wasn't having it. He saw nothing wrong with his behavior, and the praises from every cop they worked with wasn't helping. He had yet to wear a suit either. Rossi also noticed Hotch coming into work with wounded knuckles a couple of different times.

Rossi sat in his office, again, trying to figure out what to do. He had even had the team ask Hotch to go out for drink, but Hotch politely turned them down. He had talked to Jess and Jack, too, and while they knew he was different, they didn't have any complaints about his behavior toward them.

After four days and no cases, Rossi thought it was time for a visit to Hotch's house. Before he could leave, though, his phone went off. It was Jessica.

"Everything ok?" Rossi asked her.

"Yeah, I was just wondering if you could try to get Aaron to leave at a decent time tonight." Rossi furrowed his brows. "He's been working so late, I'm worried his going to work himself into the ground."

"Sure, Jess. I'll try, but you know how he can be," Rossi told her with a chuckle.

"Yeah. Thanks, Dave," she told him and the call ended.

_What the hell are you up to, Hotch?_ Rossi wondered as he left his office to see if Hotch was still there. He wasn't, and Rossi knew that Hotch had been leaving at six all week. Rossi stood there for a minute and then went to Garcia's lair.

"How's my Principal of Pasta?" Garcia asked him in her usual friendly tone.

"Hey, Kitten. Trace Hotch's cell for me."

"What? What's wrong?"

"Just do it, please," Rossi asked her as he squeezed her shoulders.

"Ok, but if he finds out, he'll kill me," she told him as she started the trace.

"If he finds out, I'll make sure he knows it was me."

The trace narrowed to their part of Virginia, and within moments Garcia had an address. "He's at a bar? Without us?"

Rossi could hear the hurt in her voice. "Send the address to my phone." She nodded. Once she was done, Rossi spun her chair around so she was facing him. "This doesn't leave us two," he told her seriously.

"Ok," she told him and nodded.

XXX

Rossi pulled up to the bar and checked to make sure his pistol was at his side. The place was a dive, and he couldn't figure out what Hotch was doing there. He took a deep breath and walked in. The smoke was thick and Rossi grunted at the complete lack of following the nonsmoking law. The place also smelled of stale beer and puke. A couple people gave him a passing glance as he walked through, but most people were too busy to notice him. He found Hotch in the back, drinking a beer, and playing pool with some huge biker guy. There was also a sleazy looking blonde hanging on Hotch's arm.

As soon as Hotch saw Dave, he rolled his eyes and pushed the woman away from him. "Really, Rossi?"

"What are you doing, Aaron?"

"Blowing off some steam, what's it look like?"

"I don't know. That's why I'm asking."

"Go home, Rossi," Hotch told him as he went back to playing pool.

"No I'm not. Not until you tell me what you're doing here."

Hotch lined up a shot and sunk the ball. He gave Rossi a passing glance as he walked around the table and lined up his next shot. Rossi went up and place his hand on the ball Hotch was aiming at.

"Hey!" the biker guy yelled and advanced on Rossi. Rossi stood his ground, but Hotch stopped the man with a hand to his chest and a look that would stop a charging rhino.

"Whatever!" the guy yelled and threw his stick on the table.

"Really, Rossi? You trying to get yourself killed?" Hotch asked as he threw his stick on the table, too.

It didn't escape Rossi that Hotch had only been calling him by his last name. "What the hell are you doing in a place like this, Aaron?"

"I was enjoying a game of pool until you showed up," Hotch told him and took a drink of his beer.

"You know what I mean."

"First you were second guessing everything I did at work, now you're second guessing what I do on my own time? Damn, Rossi, when did you become my father?" Hotch asked him coldly.

Rossi felt like Hotch had hit him the stomach. "I've never claimed to be your father," Rossi told him softly and turned around and left.


	8. Chapter 8

**Chapter 8**

Hotch couldn't help but see the hurt on Rossi's face. "Shit!" Hotch said as he slammed his beer on the table and went after Rossi.

He caught up with him on the sidewalk in front of the bar. "Dave!" Rossi turned and Hotch saw the tears in his eyes. "Dave, I'm sorry. I didn't mean that."

"It's alright, Aaron. What you do with your time is none of my business," he told him in a flat tone.

"I'm sorry," Hotch told him again.

Rossi studied him for a moment. He thought Hotch was being sincere, but he couldn't get over the shock of what he had said. "It's fine. I'll see you at work in the morning," he told him, went to his car, got in, and drove away.

"Just fucking great, Hotchner!" Hotch yelled into the street and slammed his fist into the side of the building. The dented metal siding didn't faze him and he stomped to his car.

XXX

The next morning, the whole team could sense the tension between Rossi and Hotch. JJ actually teared up as she talked to Morgan and Reid. "If he's pushed Rossi away, there's no help for him."

"They've been mad at each other before, JJ. They'll work it out," Reid assured her. They watched Rossi walk to his office from the break room.

"He looks like a dog that's just been kicked," JJ told them. They agreed, but they weren't sure what to do about it. It hadn't escaped anyone's attention that Hotch's left hand was bruised and swollen, either.

After the case presentation, they were on their way to Texas. Somebody was killing one woman every day for the last four days. The unsub was being especially brutal, too. They did their initial assessment on the jet, and everyone noticed that Rossi only spoke when spoken to. Morgan was getting more and more pissed. JJ and Reid were getting more and more upset, and Blake tried to shoot the breeze with them all to defuse the tension. The whole ride to Texas was miserable for them all.

They hit the ground running and even with the tension, they narrowed down their list of possible unsubs within a day, and by the third day, they were getting really close. Bodies were discovered every day, but that led to more evidence. By the fourth day, they knew who their unsub was. When they approached the local police with the evidence, the local cop's face blanched. Apparently, Thomas Jones, the young man they thought was responsible, was the son of a very prominent judge. He had been in a lot of trouble all growing up, but he had never faced any consequences for his actions because his father had gotten him out of it every time.

"We can call in the state police. We have the jurisdiction to make him face state charges," JJ suggested.

"God, I hope that works," the local cop told them.

"Now all we need to do is find him," Blake pointed out, and they all went back to work to try and locate the monster.

After not having any strong ideas where he was, Hotch sent the team to the hotel for the night and fresh eyes in the morning. When Reid asked him if he was going, too, Hotch told he would be along shortly, for them to go get something to eat. With a shrug, Reid followed everyone else out of the conference room.

By the time the team had finished eating, they realized Hotch was already at the hotel. They all eyed his room door as they passed it, but no one wanted to stop and talk to him. Morgan noticed Rossi hesitate, shake his head, and then go into his own room. Morgan sighed deeply and went into his room.

At 1:00 in the morning, Hotch quietly left his room and went down the hall to the exit. He got in the SUV and headed to where he thought Jones was. In all of the paperwork, no one noticed that Jones' grandfather had owned a cabin, and Hotch knew it was secluded enough for Jones to use to torture his victims. There was a full moon, so Hotch turned off the SUV's lights as he approached the cabin. He parked the SUV a safe distance away and walked the rest of the way on foot. He quickly looked through one of the windows and saw Jones cleaning blood off himself with a smile. Hotch's face showed all of the anger he was feeling as he made his way to the front door.

Hotch brought up his left foot, and kicked the door in with ease. Jones was so surprised that he just stood there in shock at the sight of the lone man holding a pistol on him. Jones glanced at a knife sitting on the table about four feet away from him. Hotch smiled. "Go ahead. Try it." Hotch told him as he put his pistol back in its holster. Jones looked back toward the door suspiciously. "There's no one else. I'm alone," Hotch told him as he looked at the body of another woman who had died at the hands of the sadistic bastard. Hotch crossed his arms across his chest; he had on a pair of black leather gloves.

"You think you can take me in?" Jones asked and then laughed. "My old man will get me off!"

"I never said I was here to take you in," Hotch told him casually.

Jones eyed him and took Hotch's casualness to mean that Hotch wasn't a threat to be worried about. He thought wrong. Jones lunged for the knife, but Hotch's foot caught his face before he could reach it. As Jones stumbled backwards, Hotch grabbed the knife. Within seconds Hotch was on him and had him backed against the wall. "Is this what you wanted?" Hotch asked him, his voice full of anger. "Here!" Hotch yelled as he stabbed Jones in the stomach. "How?" he stabbed him again. "Does" And again. "It" and again "feel?" and again. The man was begging him to stop. Hotch let him go and Jones sunk to the floor. Hotch knelt down and put his face inches away from Jones'. "Is that what they did? Did they beg for their lives?" Jones didn't answer as he breathed heavily. Hotch fixed him with his stare, and the young man actually yelped. "Tell Satan I said 'hi' when you see him!" Hotch told him with a wicked grin and plunged the knife into the man's chest, striking his heart.

Hotch stood up, his teeth clenched and breathing heavily. He gave the dead man one last look and pulled off the blood soaked gloves as he walked out of the cabin. He stripped off his shirt and put it on the ground with the gloves. Then he poured some paint thinner on top of them from a can he found on the cabin's porch. He took out a match, lit it, and dropped it onto the bloody garments. Once the fire was going good, he also dropped the can onto the fire. He watched as the little fire consumed all the evidence that he had ever been there. He smiled and waited to make sure everything was destroyed. He took a deep breath and realized that he actually felt good. All of the anger that had been burning away inside him was gone. Once the fire had done its job, he spread the ashes around and kicked dirt on top of it. With another smile, he walked back to SUV and then put on the extra shirt he had brought with him.

On the way back to the hotel, Hotch stopped and bought himself a coffee. It wouldn't be good to be caught out if he didn't have a reason to have left the hotel. He quietly made his way to his room, cleaned his shoes, put his dirty clothes into his go bag, took a shower, and then finally laid down. He fell asleep quickly.

The next morning everyone grabbed a quick breakfast, and Hotch even joined him. Rossi was surprised at how Hotch was acting. He could tell he was trying to actually be like his old self, and Rossi thought that maybe there might be a chance that Hotch would eventually make it back to who he was before. Hotch hurried them up and they all went to the station to try and figure out where Jones could be hiding. They got one report that he was staying at a friend's house, so they grabbed their vests and raided the house, but Jones wasn't there. At about two that afternoon, they were all thinking that the young man had just disappeared.

The station got a call at three, someone had spotted Jones car at a cabin in the woods, so they suited up again. They followed a police cruiser to the cabin and prepared to enter the cabin. Hotch, Rossi, and JJ took the side door, and Morgan, Blake, and Reid took the front. Within seconds they had found another victim and Jones.

"What the hell?" the detective exclaimed when he took in Jones' body.

"This is Sarah Collins," Blake told them as she looked over the dead woman's body.

"So he killed her, and then someone came in and killed him?" Rossi wondered aloud.

Hotch and Morgan were examining Jones' body. "That knife looks to be the same length that he used on his victims," Hotch pointed out.

"Yeah. Somebody sure was pissed. You think it might be one of the victim's family?" Morgan asked Hotch.

"Wouldn't surprise me," he told him and then leaned in closer to him. "We are in Texas," he whispered.

Morgan nodded and gave Hotch a small smile.

"Well, I think we can handle this one boys," the detective told them. "Though, I can't say I'm sorry for him. He got what he deserved."

They all eyed the detective warily but didn't say anything.

"They probably won't even look for the killer, will they?" JJ asked on the ride back to the station to wrap everything up.

"Probably not," Rossi told her.

XXX

Hotch's good mood didn't last for very long. Two days later, mean Hotch showed back up. Even though he was working hard to hide it, Rossi saw it sticking its ugly head out every once and a while. They were on a case in Oregon, and Hotch snapped at a young officer nearly scaring the poor boy to death. Hotch quickly apologized, but the whole team saw it. Within three days, the unsub was caught and they were on their way back home. Hotch sat in the back of the jet staring out the window. They could all feel the anger coming off of him in waves, and none of them were brave enough to ask him what was wrong. When they landed, he was the first to jump up and leave. The team looked at Rossi as they watched Hotch's car pull out of the parking lot. Rossi sighed.

"When are you two gonna patch things up?" Morgan asked him.

"Yeah, at least when he wasn't mad at you, he seemed at little more like old Hotch," JJ pointed out.

Rossi had never told them about his encounter with Hotch at the bar. "I'll try to talk to him tomorrow after work, but I can't promise anything."

They all accepted that, and they all made their way to their cars and home. Rossi was only in the car for five minutes when Jack called him. "Hey Buddy," Rossi answered worried that Hotch had done something.

"Hey, Uncle Dave. Can you do me a favor?"

"Anything for you, Buddy."

"Can you check on Daddy?"

"What do you mean?"

"He called and said that I had to stay with Aunt Jess, and that's fine. I know he's tired, but. . ."

"But what, Jack?"

"He seemed mad. I don't want Daddy to be mad."

Rossi's heart sank. "You want me to go over and check on him?"

"Please."

"Ok, Buddy. Don't worry, Jack, he'll be fine."

"Thanks, Uncle Dave. I love you."

"I love you, too."

Rossi ended the call, turned his car around, and headed to Hotch's.

Rossi let himself in with his key. A stereo was playing the Beatles' White Album very loudly. Rossi winced at the volume as he went to the stereo and turned it down. "Hotch?" Rossi called. He didn't want to accidently walk in on Hotch doing something he didn't want to see. Before, Rossi knew there would be no way Hotch would bring a woman home, but after seeing the woman at the bar, Rossi wasn't so sure anymore. Hotch didn't answer, and Rossi started to get worried. "Hotch?"

Finally Hotch's office door opened. "Rossi?" Hotch called back as he made his way to the living room. He was breathing heavily and his face was flushed. Hotch quickly put his hands in his back pockets as he stood there looking at Rossi.

"What the hell, Hotch?"

"What are you doing here, Rossi?" Hotch snapped.

"What were you doing?"

"None of your business. Why are you here?" Hotch asked again. Rossi decided to ignore him and went to walk down the hall towards Hotch's office. Hotch stepped in front of him to block him. "What do you want?" Hotch asked him coldly. Rossi went to step past him and Hotch stopped him by putting his hand on Rossi's chest. "Don't"

Rossi noticed Hotch's bloody knuckles. "What are you doing in there, Aaron?" Rossi asked suddenly very worried.

"Nothing. Just go, Dave."

Rossi studied him for a moment and pushed past him. Hotch grabbed his shoulder and pulled him back. Rossi looked at Hotch's left hand; it had balled into a fist. "Jesus, Aaron. Are you going to hit me?" Rossi was actually scared he might.

Hotch suddenly realized what he was doing and a look of fear crept onto his face. He let go of Rossi and his hands went to his head as he turned away from him. "What the hell is wrong with me?" he screamed and fell to his knees.

Rossi's eyes watered and he went up to his friend. "It's gonna be ok, Aaron," he told him as he put his hand on Hotch's shoulder. Rossi's heart was breaking as he watched Hotch break down and cry. Rossi moved and got down on his knees in front of him. "Aaron, talk to me. What's going on?"

Hotch looked at him and Rossi could see a mixture of emotions in his eyes: fear, pain, and anger. "I don't know. Everything's fine for a while and then. . ." He broke down crying again.

Rossi pulled him into a hug and rubbed his hand in circles on his back. "It's ok. It's ok," Rossi kept telling him. After a few minutes Hotch settled down and pulled away from Rossi. "It's going to be alright, Aaron."

"Really?" Hotch laughed. "Cause I don't think so. I feel like I'm losing my mind, Dave."

"We'll get this straightened out," Rossi told him.

Hotch wiped his face. "You may not be so sure when you look in my office," Hotch told him quietly.

Rossi looked past Hotch to the door down the hall. He wasn't sure he wanted to know what was in there now, but he got up and went to the room. Hotch stayed on the floor.


	9. Chapter 9

**Chapter 9**

Rossi slowly walked down the hallway toward Hotch's office. With one last glance at Hotch, he opened the door. "Jesus Christ!" Rossi muttered as he took in the room. It looked like a tornado had ravaged the room. Every shelf was torn off the walls, every trophy Hotch had ever earned was laying in broken pieces, every piece of glass whether from a picture or not, was broken into a thousand tiny pieces, every plaque was broken and lying on the floor, every piece of paper that had been filed neatly in the filing cabinet was shredded. What bothered Rossi the most, though, was the numerous holes in the wall. Now he knew why Hotch had shown up with bloody and bruised knuckles every so often. Since the house was older, Hotch wasn't just punching through drywall. It was drywall over top over plaster and lath, and Rossi wondered how Hotch had never broken his hand. He could tell some of the holes had taken several tries to make it all the way though, but he could also see where some of the holes had been made with one strike. He silently thanked God that Hotch hadn't hit him, he shuddered to think how powerful Hotch's fists must have become after hitting the wall so many times.

"See what I mean?" Hotch asked, suddenly behind Rossi.

Rossi turned to him with tears in his eyes. "Jesus, Aaron. How long has this been going on?"

Hotch looked at the floor. "Since I came back." He looked at Rossi. "Everything's fine for a while, and then I just get so mad. I don't know how to control it."

"Has Jack seen this?"

"No! I can tell when it's getting to be too much, but I don't know how to stop it."

Rossi looked at the room again. Everything Hotch had ever owned was ruined, and it broke his heart that he hadn't realized how bad Hotch was getting. "So you're getting angry."

Hotch nodded. "It just comes out of nowhere. I have tried to be who you all want me to be, I really have. I've watched you all and I think I have it down, but then I get angry, and I can't control it." Hotch took a shaky breath. "I've tried to be what you all need to be."

Rossi's heart broke even more. Hotch was trying to be old Hotch. That meant he wasn't old Hotch; that he was just pretending to be. Rossi shook his head. _I knew it! God damn it!_ "Aaron, you don't need to pretend to be something you're not," Rossi told him as he looked him in the eyes.

"I don't? Yeah right! I see the way you all look at me! I know you all don't like me anymore." Hotch's eyes teared up again. "You all want me to be the way I used to be, but I don't know how to be that guy. I don't know how not to be the way I am!" Hotch told him as the tears streamed down his face. "And this damn anger! It's turned me into an asshole. I know it has. I try to keep it in check, but it just boils until it erupts, and I hurt the only people who have ever cared about me."

Rossi knew he was referring to the bar. "Aaron, I'm sorry we've put you through this. If we've put too much pressure on you. . ."

"I should just quit. I should just go somewhere where they don't know me, and then they wouldn't have anything to compare me to."

Rossi could tell by Hotch's face and tone that he felt defeated. "Please don't do that. It will take some time, Aaron, but we don't want to lose you. We can still like you even if you are different."

Hotch huffed. "That's funny, Dave. Every time I have been myself is when you all like me the least," Hotch told him coldly and then walked back to the living room.

Rossi shook his head. _Can we like this new Hotch? Yes, damn it! I can't lose you Aaron!_ Rossi followed Hotch after he shut the door to Hotch's office. Hotch was sitting on the couch with his head in his hands. "Aaron, I can't lose you. I don't care what I have to do; I will do anything you need me to do to make this work."

Hotch looked up at him. "It's not going to matter one way or the other if I don't get a handle on this anger. I feel like it's eating me up inside."

Rossi walked up and put his hand on Hotch's shoulder. He remembered a line he read while he was researching that chilled him to the bone: If the prefrontal cortex or amygdala is damaged in a severe TBI, patients may experience an inability to control aggressive or violent behaviors. "Well, let's look at that for a minute. Do you think it would help to talk to someone, you know, anger management or something?"

Hotch laughed. "That would work if there was something that I was actually mad at. There's no reason for it; it just happens."

Rossi sat down in the chair opposite him. "So then we just need to figure out a constructive way for you to release it. Hell, a punching bag would be better than your walls."

"Yeah," Hotch chuckled as he looked as his knuckles. "I wish it was that easy. Punching the walls only helps a little. It isn't until I explode that it seems to go away. I've even tried running it off. I hit six miles and while I was totally exhausted, I was still angry. I've even been going to the range to try to blow off steam. I can shoot a smiley face into a target, but I can't get past this God damned anger."

Rossi bit his lip trying to figure out a way to help his friend. "What happened in Texas?"

Hotch controlled his expression with ease. "What do you mean?"

"Well, it seemed like you were going to explode then, but the next morning you seemed ok."

Hotch pictured slamming the knife into Hanson's chest. "I actually slept good for once," Hotch lied.

"You haven't been sleeping?"

Hotch shook his head. "Only a couple hours at a time."

"Maybe you need some sleeping pills or something." He could tell from Hotch's reaction that he didn't want to do that, and he liked the reaction. Hotch had never been one to take pills, and it was nice to know some things hadn't changed. "Well, we have to figure out something. You can't keep living like this."

"I know," Hotch told him weakly.

Rossi didn't like the way he sounded so defeated. He worried for a second that Hotch might actually do something to hurt himself, or worse, kill himself. "Well, first off you need to stop being someone you're not. Maybe your frustration over trying to be old Hotch is helping to fuel your anger." Hotch looked at him questioningly. "Let us get to know you as you are now. You never know, we may like you more." Rossi told him with a smile, trying to boost his friend's mood.

Hotch chuckled. "I guess I can try it. I don't think you all can hate me any more than what you already do," Hotch told him dryly.

Rossi grabbed Hotch's chin and looked him in the eyes. "We don't hate you, Aaron. We've just have been too stupid to realize what you've been going through. I'll talk to the team. We will do whatever we can to help you through this. You know we all love you, Aaron. We're family, and families have their problems, but they always get through them."

XXX

Rossi had the team over to his house for dinner the next night. He told them what had happened at Hotch's and they were all stunned.

"So there's no going back? He will never be the same old Hotch he was before?" Morgan asked.

"I think if it was going to be temporary, it would have changed by now, but I don't know," Rossi confessed.

"And we've just been making it worse?" JJ asked with tear in her eyes.

Rossi nodded.

"So, we just need to get to know him again," Blake mused.

"What if we. . . I mean, what if he. . ." Reid shook his head. Rossi had never seen him so indecisive before.

"You're worried you won't like him now?"

Reid nodded. "He just seems really cold."

"Only compared to what he used to be. If you just met him, would you still think that?" Rossi asked him.

Reid's eyes got wide. "I thought he was intimidating then!"

Rossi laughed. "Yeah, that's true, but just give it some time. We just need to stop comparing him to before. I'm afraid that if we can't all become comfortable around him again that he'll leave the BAU."

That made everyone shake their heads. They all knew how much Hotch loved his job, or at least how much he used to.

"What about this anger issue, though, what can we do to help that?" JJ asked.

Rossi took a deep breath. "I don't know, other than keep an eye out for when he's getting bad, and then try to calm him down."

"More like just him the space he needs," Morgan told him.

"And not take it personally when he snaps," Blake pointed out.

"Actually, I think he has become a better agent," Reid started. "We have been solving cases at least fifteen percent faster since he's been back."

Rossi smiled. He knew the team would rally behind Hotch. Now he just had to make sure Hotch believed it.

XXX

Hotch's anger hadn't subsided after Rossi had found him at his house. It had turned to a dull fury, but by that night it was threatening to explode again. He knew he had to do something as he drove around trying to figure out what to do. It was late so there wasn't that many options left open for him. He was driving around aimlessly and he found himself in bad part of Georgetown. He unconsciously reached for his pistol, but it wasn't there; he'd left it at home. As he passed an alley he saw a man handling a woman roughly. He smiled as he pulled his car to the side of the road. He got out and walked to the alley. He knew he should have been afraid to walk into a dark alley without a weapon, but he wasn't. He hadn't felt fear since he woke in the hospital. Hotch noticed the woman was struggling to get away from the man. The man slapped her across the face and said something to her. The only thing Hotch could make out was the word 'bitch'.

"You need some help, miss?" Hotch asked as he approached them.

The man looked at Hotch with surprise. He hadn't heard anyone coming. "Mind your own business. If you know what's good for you, you'll turn your ass around and head back the way you came."

The woman looked at Hotch with pleading eyes. "I don't think the woman agrees," Hotch told him coldly as he put a pair of gloves on.

"Look, you son of a bitch, I said get lost," the man told him as he pulled a knife out from the small of his back. The woman screamed; apparently she didn't realize he had it. The man shoved her away pointed the knife at Hotch.

Hotch smiled again. "You should rethink what you are about to do."

"What?!"

The woman took off running down the alley and disappeared around the building.

"You better know how to use that," Hotch told him as he stepped closer to him.

"Just try me, fucker!" The man yelled as he swiped the blade at Hotch.

Hotch kept getting closer. "Oh, I think I will." The man swung the blade again and Hotch tackled him once the blade had arched out of the way. The man struggled and tried to stab Hotch. Hotch deftly avoided the blade each time and ended up wrenching it from the man's hands. Hotch noticed there was dried blood already on the blade, and his anger grew. "Who else have you used this on, huh?" The man was too stupid to understand the look in Hotch's eyes. He kicked Hotch in the balls, and Hotch groaned as the man rolled Hotch off of him. The man stood up and kicked Hotch in the stomach twice before Hotch took his legs out from under him with a sweep of his leg and in seconds Hotch was on him and had stabbed him in the chest.

Hotch knew his aim was perfect and he got off the man before he could get any blood on him. He thought about hiding the body, but decided it wasn't worth the effort and slowly walked out of the alley and back towards his car. He took his gloves off as sat down, started the car, and headed home.

Hotch winced as he took in the bruises developing on ribs. He took a hot shower and get into bed. He smiled as he laid there looking at the ceiling. He finally figured out what he had to do to get rid of the anger.


	10. Chapter 10

**Chapter 10**

The next morning, the whole team was a little worried. They knew what was going on with Hotch and they were going to try their hardest to get used to the new Hotch, but they weren't prepared for who came into the bullpen. Hotch was actually smiling as he walked through the glass doors. Morgan and Garcia were next to JJ and them. They all exchanged glances as they watched their unit chief walk to his office. "Well he doesn't look mad to me," Garcia told them with a smile.

"Yeah, but Hotch smiling to himself is even more creepy than him scowling," JJ told them.

"Maybe he had a good morning," Blake mused.

"Remember what Rossi said. We're not supposed to compare him to the old Hotch," Reid pointed out.

"I'm not. I'm comparing him to yesterday," JJ told him.

"Well, let's just play it by ear and see how the day goes before any of us make any decisions. Hell, it might take him several days to actually figure out how he really wants to act around us. Let's all just play it cool," Morgan told them as he headed back to his office.

"If he smiles more, I think I'll like new Hotch more," Garcia told them with a smile and headed to her office.

Rossi noticed them and realized Hotch had made it in. He got up to go see how Hotch was feeling. He knocked on Hotch's opened door once and walked in without waiting for an answer. Rossi knew that Hotch had gotten over the anger. He watched him pick up the day's case file. "Wow. You actually look rested," Rossi told him with a smile.

"Yeah, I actually slept for six hours last night."

"So, how are you feeling?"

"I'm good, Dave."

"You'd tell me if you weren't?"

Hotch looked up from the file and locked eyes with Rossi. "Yes, Dave. I will tell you when I think I need a break," Hotch told him honestly.

Rossi nodded and smiled again. "Alright, I'll see you in the conference room," Rossi told him and left Hotch's office. JJ, Reid, and Blake all saw the smile on Rossi's face as he went back to his own office.

At 9:00 they had their case meeting and they were headed to Ohio. A serial rapist was wreaking havoc and they needed the BAU's help. They were only gone three days, and Hotch was fine until the trip home. Rossi noticed Hotch getting a little antsy, so he went over to sit beside him. "You ok?"

Hotch glanced over at him. "Yeah. I think so. I just feel like I have too much pent up energy."

"But you're not mad?"

"No, not yet."

"Is it coming?"

"I don't know. This is something new. Jesus Christ, Dave, what the hell else is gonna happen to me?" Hotch asked as his leg started bouncing rapidly.

"I wish I knew the answer to that, I really do," Rossi told him sincerely. He leaned closer to Hotch. "You think a drink would help? I still have that bottle hidden in the galley."

Hotch chuckled. "It might. I guess it couldn't hurt. I feel like a kid on a sugar high."

Rossi patted him on the leg. "I'll go get it."

The team looked worriedly at Rossi as he walked past, but his look told them that Hotch was alright. He filled a red plastic cup about half way full. He knew the team would guess what was in it, but it was still better then openly flaunting it. He handed Hotch the cup and he downed it. "Jesus Christ, Aaron," Rossi said quietly.

Hotch had always sipped his scotch before. _Damn it, stop comparing him to before, Dave._ Hotch sucked in a deep breath to help alleviate the burn in his chest. "Thanks," Hotch told him with a tilt of his head.

Rossi wondered what Hotch been drinking since his accident to make him able to chug the scotch so easily. "No problem." Within fifteen minutes Hotch seemed to relax. "Better?"

"Yeah."

"You picking up Jack on the way home?"

"Yep."

"Good." Rossi knew that if Hotch was picking up Jack, than Hotch was truly feeling alright.

XXX

Two days later, they got a case right in DC. There were several deadly carjackings that the police needed help with. The team drove their SUV's out to the scenes and the police station. They had one suspect in custody but he wasn't giving them anything to help find the other man who had been his partner. JJ joined Hotch in the interrogation room. Since Hotch was seen as such a bad ass by the unsubs he had dealt with since his accident, JJ decided she'd play the sympathetic mom role. After Hotch scared the shit out of the guy and left the room, JJ moved in and won his confidence. He rolled on his partner in five minutes. They both won the praise of the DC police and they suited up to go take down the partner.

They found the man in a hotel room. SWAT was already on the scene, but they hadn't breeched the door. "What's the hold up?" Hotch asked as they joined the officers in the parking lot.

"Damn fool has a genade," the lead officer told him.

"Has the hotel been evacuated?" Rossi asked with concern.

"Yes, but he won't even answer the phone," the man told him.

"Can your snipers get a clear shot," Rossi asked.

"Not yet, but they're ready if they get one."

Hotch started walking towards the steps leading to the killer's room.

"Hotch!" Morgan and Rossi yelled at the same time.

Hotch stopped about halfway up the steps and turned to look at them.

"You can't go in there! He's got a grenade!" Morgan told him as they ran up to him.

"Yeah?" Hotch asked. They could clearly see that he had no idea what the problem was.

"You can't go in there. It's too dangerous!" Morgan pleaded.

"I got this, Morgan, calm down." Hotch told him and started up the stairs again. Morgan looked at Rossi.

Rossi ran up and pulled Hotch's arm to stop him. "Hotch, I know you aren't feeling any fear right now, but believe me you should be."

"Don't worry, Dave. I'm not going to get myself blown up again," Hotch told him with a smile. Rossi shuddered, he had never seen that type of smile on Hotch face before. "Trust me, Dave."

Rossi took a deep breath. "Alright. All you have to do is get him in front of the window for the snipers to get a shot."

"But that would just take all the fun out of it," Hotch told him and went towards the room.

Rossi shuddered again; he wasn't sure if Hotch was joking or not. Morgan gave Rossi a look. "Let him try whatever he has in mind. Remember we agreed to let him be himself," Rossi told him as he watched Hotch enter the room without even drawling his pistol.

"Well, I just hope he doesn't get himself blown up. Not having any fear is going to get him killed," Morgan told him seriously.

"Hotch is too smart to let that happen," Rossi told him and suddenly the man that was holed up in the room came tumbling out onto the balcony. Apparently Hotch had thrown the man out of the room. Morgan rushed up and grabbed the man and cuffed him. Hotch came out of the room and tossed Morgan the grenade. Morgan caught it easily, and Hotch went down the stairs back towards the SUVs. Rossi looked at Morgan, and Morgan just shook his head.

As the team wrapped up the case, Rossi noticed Hotch getting more and more quiet. He walked over to Hotch and as soon as he saw the look in Hotch's eyes, he knew Hotch was trying to keep a lid on his anger. "What can I do?"

Hotch looked at him and Rossi knew he bit back a smart comment. "Cover for me. I've got to get out of here."

"How long do you need?"

"I'll see you in the morning at the office," Hotch told him as he turned to leave.

"How are you going to get home?"

"Don't worry about it. I'll be fine," Hotch told and started to walk away. Rossi caught his arm, but quickly let go and winced at the look Hotch gave him. "I've got to do something, Dave, or I won't be able to get Jack tonight."

Rossi nodded and let him leave without another word.

XXX

The next morning Hotch was getting ready while Jack was eating breakfast. The news was on the tv in the living room. Hotch froze when he heard a report. He walked out to the living room and listened as the reporter commented on five gang members who had been brutally murdered in the night. Cops had no leads and it seemed there were no witnesses. Hotch finished tucking in his shirt and walked back to his room with a smile on his face.

XXX

Rossi was also watching the news as he drank his morning coffee. The report of five gang members being brutally murdered didn't even catch his attention; they were always killing each other. He flipped the channel and didn't find anything else worth watching, so he shut it off and got up to get ready to leave for the office.

XXX

It was about a week before Rossi noticed Hotch's anger returning. They had just gotten back from a case and Hotch kept it well hidden, but when they asked him to join them for a drink once they got back, Hotch told them no and Rossi could see it in his eyes. Rossi pulled him to the side before he let Hotch get into his car. "Where are you going?"

"Not now, Dave," Hotch told him as he opened his car door.

Rossi stepped in front of the door so it wouldn't open all the way. "Yes now. What are you going to do?"

Hotch gave him intensified stare. "I'm going to blow off steam."

"How?" Rossi knew he was pushing his luck, but he really wanted to know how Hotch blew off steam.

"I'm not destroying any other room in my house if that's what you're wondering."

"Yet, I still saw your knuckles bloody after we were in DC."

"Don't, Dave. Now please move before I can't control myself anymore." Hotch's tone was deadly.

Rossi studied him for a moment and finally moved out of the way. He would find out where Hotch was going by other means. He watched him drive off and went back inside to talk to Garcia. They watched as Hotch drove home, and after an hour of him not leaving, Rossi decided to go check up on his friend.

Rossi pulled into Hotch's drive way and knew what Hotch had done. Since Hotch's car was gone, he knew Hotch had left his phone home on purpose. He smiled at Hotch's cunning, but was even more concerned about what Hotch was doing. It did scare him a little to think that Hotch was somewhere with no way to call for help if it was needed. It scared him a little more to know that Hotch wanted to keep whatever he was doing away from the prying eyes of the team and Garcia's tracing capabilities. Rossi decided he would just wait for Hotch to get home. _What are you doing, Aaron?_


	11. Chapter 11

**Chapter 11**

Rossi almost left, thinking Hotch wasn't ever going to come home, but at about two in the morning Hotch pulled up. Rossi could tell Hotch was not happy to see him. Rossi got out of his car and could also see the blood Hotch was wiping off his face before he got out of his car. Rossi pulled Hotch's door open. "What the hell, Hotch?"

Hotch rolled his eyes at him and got out of his car. "Have you been waiting for me all night?"

Rossi could tell by Hotch's tone that he wasn't angry. "Yes. What happened to you?" Rossi asked as he followed Hotch to the door and noticed Hotch's slight limp.

Hotch sighed heavily. "Some guy thought I was cheating at pool," Hotch lied as he opened his door and went inside with Rossi following.

"You got into some bar fight?"

"Yep."

"Jesus Christ, Aaron. You could have been arrested."

"It wasn't the type of place to call the cops, Dave. Relax." Rossi studied him for a moment. He couldn't tell if Hotch was telling the truth or not. He went to his drink cabinet and took out his scotch decanter. "You want one?" Hotch asked him acting like nothing was wrong.

Rossi finally sighed. "Sure." Hotch handed him the glass he already poured and poured himself another glass. They went to the couch. "I hope the other guy looks worse than you," Rossi told him with a grin.

Hotch gave him a sly smile. "He'll have a headache tomorrow."

XXX

The next morning, Rossi didn't pay any attention to the news as a reporter commented on a known drug lord being found beaten to death in an alley Manassas. His head had been bashed into the pavement. Once they were all at the office they got a case that took them to Vermont. Four days later and the team getting along with Hotch, Rossi started to think that things were finally working themselves out. Hotch was different, but not so different that he couldn't be liked. He was definitely more of a smart ass, more sarcastic, more driven in the cases (which Rossi didn't even think was possible), more of an action man, but yet still a thinker. Hotch was a darker person than what he used to be, but it wasn't to the point of anyone seeing it as problem. He was also becoming more physically fit. Not having suits to cover his arms all the time had let them all see that he was bulking out a little.

Rossi liked the way things were going, yet he still had a gnawing feeling in his gut, and he couldn't figure out what it was for the life of him. He knew it was because of the anger that Hotch would fill up with, and Rossi knew Hotch was taking risks when he felt it; he just wished Hotch would let him in on what Hotch did to get past the anger. He thought that if he could figure out what Hotch was doing, then at least it would put his mind at ease. It had even crossed his mind that Hotch had joined some fight club type thing, but Hotch never showed up bruised or anything except for his knuckles. Unless Hotch had become a better fighter really fast, he didn't think that was a viable explanation.

He vowed to follow Hotch the next time it happened, and he got his chance three days later after a quick case right in Virginia. Hotch arrested the unsub and Rossi could tell Hotch wanted to hit him. The anger shown in his eyes, but Hotch kept a lid on it until the case was closed. Rossi let Hotch leave and got in his car to follow him.

After twenty minutes and several turns later, Rossi found himself in the bad part of DC. _What the hell are you doing here, Aaron?_ Rossi wondered as he pulled up to park a block away from where Hotch had pulled over. There was only one working street light, but Rossi didn't think that Hotch had gotten out. For a split second, Rossi wondered if Hotch had gotten into drugs as a way to get over the anger, but he dismissed that just as quickly as it came because he knew Hotch wasn't showing any sign of drug abuse.

After about thirty minutes, Hotch took off down the street again. Rossi started his car and pulled out of his spot but his car surged and bucked. _What the hell?_ Rossi tried the gas again and the car cut out. He slammed his hands on the steering wheel, threw the car in park, popped the hood, and got out. He looked under the hood and didn't notice anything amiss, but he wasn't overly mechanical; so he slammed the hood and walked around the car. That's when he noticed a potato shoved into his tailpipe. _You slick son of bitch_, Rossi thought with a smile as he pulled the potato out of the pipe. He shook his head. He couldn't believe he'd fallen for one of the oldest tricks in the book since 'Beverly Hills Cop' came out. He continued to shake his head as he got in and started his car. It was fine, of course. Rossi actually chuckled at the turn of events. He should have known Hotch wouldn't be that easy to follow. He wouldn't be able to jump him about it either because then he would have to own up to following him. He drove home wondering what Hotch was doing and wondering why Hotch was so hell bent on keeping it a secret, but he chuckled again. _That was funny!_

XXX

Two cases later, the team found themselves in New York City. Someone was brutally murdering homeless people. After few leads and several days with little sleep, the whole team could see the anger eating at Hotch. Rossi followed Hotch into the parking lot at the station. "Are you ok?"

Hotch turned on him suddenly. "No, Dave, I'm not!"

"Well, what do you do when you're at home to get over it?" Rossi thought he might actually get an answer.

"We're in the middle of a case. I can't go traipsing around the city trying to find some place to blow off steam."

"Why not?" Rossi asked a little worried.

Hotch gave him a look that sent a chill down his spine. "Because it usually involves getting drunk, and I can't do that on a case."

"So you're drinking the anger off?" That didn't make sense if he was driving other places.

Hotch knew Rossi was treading a little too closely. "Yeah. Normally I find a place that I know to be dangerous. I guess the adrenaline I get from going and being in that atmosphere helps kill the anger."

Rossi had to admit that it sounded feasible. "But you don't know this city."

"And I'm on a case."

"Why don't you hit the station's gym? Hitting a bag would be better than just trying to hold it in, and I'm pretty sure they don't want you punching holes in their drywall. Hell, I'll go with you if you want."

Hotch considered him for a moment. He nodded. Maybe it would help him keep a lid on it until they could get home. "I'll get my bag, but, no, you do not need to go. Give me an hour or so and I'll be back."

Rossi watched him grab his bag out of the SUV and head back into the station. Rossi was hoping that it would work. About two hours later, Rossi attention was drawn to a crowd coming into the main part of the station.

"I am so sorry," Hotch was telling a burly sergeant as they walked into the room.

"It's fine," the man told them and the whole team stopped what they were doing to watched the crowd approach.

"No it's not. I just. . ."

"Agent Hotchner, it's fine!"

"What's fine?" Morgan asked them and eyed the throng of police officers that had followed Hotch and the sergeant.

"Agent Hotchner knocked out Sargent Mosley!" A young officer told him apparently very excited about it.

"Knocked him out?" JJ asked suddenly worried.

"In the ring," another officer told her.

"No one has ever beaten Mosley," another officer told them.

Hotch rolled his eyes and shook his head. "I said I was sorry."

Mosley smiled. "I saw him tearing the shit out of a punching bag and asked him if he wanted to get rid of his frustration with a real target. And he said he'd never boxed before," he smiled as he clasped Hotch on the back.

"You box?" Reid asked Mosley.

"He's the reigning champ of the station," an officer told him proudly.

The whole team eyed Hotch warily. "It was a lucky shot," Hotch told them innocently. Rossi could tell that the anger wasn't gone, but he didn't think that it would be hard for Hotch to control the little bit that was left.

"Yeah right, stop being so modest," Mosley told him with a grin.

Hotch shook his head. "I'm going to take a shower," he told them and made his way through the crowd of officers to congratulations and pats on the back.

XXX

After two more days they solved the case and headed home. While Hotch's anger hadn't threatened to erupt for the rest of the case, Rossi could tell it was slowly building again. He knew Hotch would have to do something about it if he wanted to get Jack from Jessica. It was early enough in the afternoon by the time they got home, so Rossi figured Hotch had plenty of time to go blow off steam. Hotch didn't leave the office, though, until later that evening. When Rossi asked him about it, Hotch said he needed to get the files done. That's when it hit Rossi that Hotch only went to get rid of his anger at night, and that bothered him. _Maybe the types of places he goes are only opened at night._ Rossi went to his office and tried not to think about what Hotch was doing, but the gnawing feeling that something wasn't right just kept bothering him.

He got up and decided to take matters into his own hands again and went to the parking garage. When he was sure no one was around he used a jimmy and opened the lock on Hotch's car. _If you won't tell me, then I have to resort to desperate measures._ He took his phone out of his pocket, turned it on silent, and wedged it up under the driver seat. He smiled as he locked the lock and shut the door. He whistled to himself as he walked back into his office to wait for Hotch to leave.


	12. Chapter 12

**Chapter 12**

After Hotch left in a very foul mood, Rossi knew he had to find out where Hotch was going. He took his laptop to Garcia and had her install the tracing program on it. Rossi didn't want Garcia to know that Rossi had put his own phone in Hotch's car, that he was tracing his own number. If Garcia traced Hotch's, it would be innocently at home, and that's all he wanted anyone else to know right then. Once he was on his way home, he stopped and picked up a rental car. It wouldn't help to sneak up on Hotch in a vehicle he knew all too well. Rossi sat in the rental on the side of the road and ran the program to search Hotch's phone; sure enough, it was at Hotch's house. Rossi took a deep a breath and had it trace his phone. He sighed heavily as soon as he realized it was zeroing in on Alexandria. Rossi started the car and pulled onto the street; the gnawing feeling actually making his stomach hurt. _Do I really want to do this? Do I want to violate Hotch's trust and track him down? What if I don't like what I find? What if I find out my best friend is doing something that I can't handle?_ Rossi shook his head. He had to know, and that's all that mattered at that point and time.

By the time Rossi got to Alexandria, Hotch was parked outside some dive bar. Rossi took a deep breath and walked in. He found Hotch much like the first time he'd found him, in the back playing pool. Rossi could instantly tell Hotch's anger was gone, and he thought for a second that Hotch had been telling him the truth. He noticed, though, that as Hotch was lining up a shot that Hotch's left hand was severely bruised and bloody, and he knew he was too late to find out what Hotch was doing. Before Rossi could turn around and disappear, Hotch notice him. The look of shock was very evident on Hotch's face.

"How the hell did you find me?" Hotch asked as soon as Rossi was close enough for him to hear over the music.

"I have my ways," Rossi told him with a grin.

Hotch studied his face. "Garcia and her damned traffic cams. I will have to have a talk with her about tracking her boss."

"She had nothing to do with it."

Hotch knew Rossi was telling the truth, but he couldn't figure out any other way that Rossi could have found him. "Go home, Dave. You don't belong here."

"And you do?" Rossi asked as he looked around at the people in the bar. While there was a mixture of people, Rossi would classify them all as thugs and criminals.

Hotch shook his head. "You won't leave unless I do, will you?"

"Nope."

"Damn it, Rossi. Why can't you just leave well enough alone?" Hotch asked him as he headed to the exit.

"You should know me better than that. I don't just leave things alone when I feel like one of my friends is in trouble."

They made it to the outside and Hotch turned to face Rossi. "I'm not in trouble, so you can stop worrying."

"Secrets have a horrible way of turning around and biting you in the ass eventually, Aaron."

Hotch looked around for Rossi's car. "Did you hide in my trunk?" Hotch joked trying to avoid the discussion.

"You might as well just tell me. You know I will find out."

"There's nothing to find out!"

Rossi studied his face. He was pretty sure Hotch was telling the truth, but the little voice in his head laughed at him again. "Then the next time you need to blow off steam, let me go with you." Rossi saw something flicker across Hotch's face but before he could figure out what it was, Hotch smiled.

"Fine. If that's what it will take to put your mind at ease, but when I treat you like an ass the whole time, don't say I didn't warn you." Hotch turned to walk to his car, but then stopped and turned back. "Do you need a ride?"

"Nope."

Hotch looked at him questioningly, shook his head, and then went to his car.

Rossi watched him drive off and then when and got in his rental.

XXX

The next morning, Rossi was getting ready as the news was playing on the tv. "Does the metropolitan area have a vigilante?" The reporter asked.

Rossi's coffee cup froze inches away from his open mouth. He put his cup down and grabbed the remote to turn up the volume. The reporter went on to talk about several mysterious deaths that had been occurring in and around DC. The latest death had happened the night before when a man suspected of raping several young girls in the area had turned up dead. He had been beaten and then impaled on a wrought iron fence. Without any structures for the man to have fallen from, they police knew he had been murdered. All of the victims had been convicted of crimes or were suspected of committing them, but none of the deaths revealed any evidence or any witnesses. The police were claiming the deaths to be related to the victims' way of life, but the reporter insisted that they were all connected. The scene then cut to the reporter talking to the public. Almost every person that was interviewed was praising the killer for getting rid of criminals that the police couldn't. Some of the people were even comparing the man to comic book heroes. The reporter ended the segment by dubbing the vigilante 'The Dealer of Justice.'

Rossi had watched the whole thing in shock. He didn't want to be thinking what he was thinking. _No! It can't be!_ Rossi turned off the tv and grabbed his laptop. He searched the murders and after looking at several of them and comparing them to his case calendar, he hung his head. _Oh, Aaron. How could you?_

Rossi jumped when his home phone went off. It was Garcia; they had a case. Rossi took a deep breath and let it out through his nose. He wasn't sure how he was going to handle his suspicions, but he knew he would have to look into it to find out for sure. He got up and turned off the tv, put his cup in the sink, and left for the BAU.

"Sorry about the early morning call, but the US Marshalls need our help," Garcia told everyone as soon as Hotch walked in the door; he was the last to show up. She went on to tell them that the Marshalls were in the process of protecting a man who had witnessed the murder of a judge. The man who committed the murder was supposedly connected to the organized crime families in New York. Several Marshalls had been killed already and they suspected a mole, so they wanted the FBI to come in and take over the protection detail for the next week until the trial began.

"Wheels up in twenty," Hotch told them, gathered his stuff, and walked out of the conference room.

"What's wrong?" Morgan asked Rossi.

"Huh?" Rossi asked, snapping out of a daze.

"What's wrong?" Morgan repeated as everyone else left the room.

"Nothing. Why?"

"Cause you seem distracted."

"Sorry. I didn't sleep well last night. It's fine," Rossi told him as he stood up.

"It's fine?"

"I mean, I'm fine. Damn, Derek, give an old guy a break," Rossi told him with a smile.

Morgan shook his head but left the room. Rossi sighed and went to his office. He stopped outside the door; Hotch was in there waiting for him. He took a deep breath and steeled himself so he wouldn't give anything away. "Hey," Rossi told Hotch as he went in and grabbed his go bag.

"I think you dropped this the last time you were in my car," Hotch told him as he held out Rossi's phone to him. The look on Hotch's face told Rossi that Hotch knew he had put it in his car.

"Thanks. I've been looking for that damn thing," Rossi lied as he took his phone back.

"Funny thing is, though, that I can't even remember the last time you were in my car."

"I have been looking for it for a while," Rossi told him as he headed back out of his office.

"Uh-huh," Hotch said as he followed Rossi, he already had his bag in his hand.

XXX

The team met with the Marshalls and they took Mike Johnson to a hotel. They had decided they would work in eight hour shifts on protective detail and the rest of the team would work on finding out who had killed the Marshalls. Hotch paired them up with Blake and Reid taking the first shift. Morgan and JJ would be next, and Hotch and Rossi would go last. The four of them not on protective detail went to a hotel across town and set up Hotch's room to be their work space. Morgan and JJ left to go get the files the Marshalls had on the case. "Why are looking at me like that?" Hotch asked Rossi.

"What?"

"Why do you keep looking at me like that?"

"I didn't realize I was looking at you any certain way."

Hotch studied him for a few seconds. "Is there something wrong?"

"Why would you ask that?"

"Because you seem to be searching for something or trying to figure something out."

Rossi tried to look innocent. "Nope, just tired." Rossi could tell Hotch didn't believe him, but he didn't press him anymore.

XXX

Three days later, the team hadn't had any problems with their protection detail and they had narrowed down the mole in the Marshall's office to three people. Hotch stretched as he got out of the SUV. He and Rossi had just gotten done with their overnight shift at protecting Mike. They had decided to stop and grab a bite to eat at a diner on their way back to their hotel. Hotch froze; he felt he was being watched. Rossi noticed Hotch's demeanor. "What?"

"Do you feel that?" Hotch could tell by Rossi's expression that he had no idea what he was talking about. Hotch shook his head. "Never mind. I think I'm just tired."

They went into the diner and ate. When they walked back to the SUV, Hotch suddenly felt someone behind him. Before he could even turn around, though, something hit him in the back of head. He fell to the ground and before the darkness enveloped him, he saw Rossi lying on the ground on the other side the SUV.


	13. Chapter 13

**Chapter 13**

Hotch moaned at the pain in his head as he started to regain consciousness. Rossi smiled when he noticed his friend finally moving. He had been afraid that the blow to Hotch's head had damaged the already damaged man. "Hotch?" Rossi asked him as he tried to scoot the chair he was cuffed to closer to Hotch.

Hotch moved his head a little more and finally opened his eyes. "Dave?"

"Right here," Rossi told him. "You ok?"

Hotch finally picked up his head and looked toward Rossi. "Where are we?" He asked as he realized his hands were cuffed behind.

"I don't know. Are you ok?"

Hotch squeezed his eyes shut for a moment. "I think so. You?"

"Just a bit of a headache."

"What the hell have we gotten ourselves into?"

"I don't know, but I have a feeling it has something to do Johnson."

"If it's the same assholes who killed those Marshalls, it doesn't look too good for us," Hotch told him seriously. He looked around the room they were being held in. It was just a bare room with no windows and one door.

"Morgan and JJ are bound to know were missing by now, but I agree we need to come up. . ." Rossi stopped as he heard the door opening. In walked Marcus Berg, the man who had killed the judge according to the Marshalls. He was suspected to be a mob hit man. _Shit! _Rossi thought.

"Well, well, well, looks like we got ourselves a couple of big, bad, FBI agents," Berg told the two men who had walked in behind him.

Rossi glanced at Hotch. Hotch's face was blank, and it almost scared Rossi.

Berg walked up to Hotch and backhanded him across the face. The side of Hotch's mouth was bleeding as he brought his head back to face the man. "Where's Johnson?"

"Fuck you," Hotch told him slowly. Rossi could see the anger growing in Hotch's eyes.

"You might as well tell me now. You'll tell me eventually," Berg told him with a smile. Hotch only looked at him. "No?" Hotch was silent. Berg cocked his arm back and punched Hotch in the gut. Hotch doubled over as the air escaped him. Before Hotch could recover, Berg punched him in the face. Hotch took a couple of deep breaths and finally sat back up. He was smiling. Rossi shuddered; Hotch's smile sent chills down his spine. "You think this is funny?" Berg asked him and punched Hotch in the face again. Hotch spit blood onto the floor and actually laughed. Rossi shuddered again. It wasn't Hotch's normal childlike guffaw; it was a sinister laugh that sounded like it came straight from hell. Rossi knew Hotch was madder than he has ever seen him. Berg looked at his companions. Rossi thought Berg actually looked worried. He looked back at Hotch. "You're a crazy son of bitch aren't you?"

"You have no idea," Hotch told him coldly.

"Where's Johnson?" Berg asked again.

"Go to hell." Hotch told him with another creepy smile.

Berg punched him in the gut again, but Rossi could tell that Hotch had tightened his stomach muscles. It looked like Berg hurt his hand and Rossi had to hide a smile. Berg smiled at Hotch. "Well, since you aren't going to help me, maybe your friend will be a little more cooperative." Berg walked over to Rossi and the smile left Hotch's face.

"Don't you touch him," Hotch told him venomously.

Berg raised his brows in surprise. "Would you be willing to trade Johnson's location to save your friend?"

"Don't Hotch. They're probably just going to kill us anyway," Rossi said quickly. He couldn't handle the fact of Hotch giving up an innocent man to save him.

Hotch just smiled at Rossi. Hotch didn't even look like Hotch, and Rossi wasn't sure to be afraid of him or Berg. Berg cocked back his arm and started to swing at Rossi's face. Before the blow could connect, Hotch let out a primal yell and dove into Berg. Their struggle knocked Rossi over in his chair and Rossi could tell the other two guys had joined in the fight. Rossi struggled to angel himself so he could see what was going on. Before the men could pull Hotch off of Berg, Rossi heard a sickly snap of bones, and Rossi knew that Berg's neck had been broken. Hotch jumped up and grabbed one of the guys and slammed him into the wall. The other guy dove into Hotch's back and they went down. Hotch punched him in the gut, and Rossi could hear the air leave his lungs. While that guy was stunned, Hotch leapt back at the other man. One powerful blow to his jaw and the man went down in a heap. Hotch quickly turned to the last man and with one more look at Hotch, he took off running out the door.

Breathing heavily, Hotch went over to Rossi and pulled him back up into a sitting position. "Are you ok?" Hotch asked him as he reached in his pocket for his handcuff key. Berg apparently didn't think he needed to worry about Hotch being able to get into his pockets. Hotch went behind Rossi and unlocked the cuffs holding his friend then quickly went back and knelt down in front of Rossi.

"Jesus Christ, Hotch!" Rossi yelled then grabbed Hotch's hands. The chain that held the handcuffs together was snapped in the middle.

"I'm sorry I knocked you down. Are you ok?" Hotch asked frantically.

"I'm fine! Are you?"

Hotch nodded as he pulled Rossi into a standing position. "We better get out of here before he brings back help," Hotch told him as he went to the side of the door and quickly looked to see if anyone was coming.

Rossi just stood there in shock over what he had witnessed. He couldn't believe what Hotch had done. Rossi looked at Berg and then to the unconscious man lying not far from him. _Son of a bitch!_

"Dave? Come on."

Rossi took a deep breath and nodded. He followed Hotch into the next room. Rossi realized they were in some sort of basement. Two more rooms and they found their guns, badges, and cell phones. "That was nice of them," Rossi said with a small smile as they both put their holsters back where they belonged; they kept their pistols in their hands.

"And stupid," Hotch told him as he led the way out of the room. They soon found some stairs and eventually found their way out onto the street. They finally put their guns away and Rossi took out his phone to call Morgan.

Within ten minutes, Morgan pulled up and so did the local police and Marshalls. Rossi told them what had happened and eventually Morgan took them to pick up their SUV at the restaurant. They went back to the hotel and Hotch said he was going to take a shower. Rossi watched him go to his room.

"Hotch has turned into one scary dude," Morgan told Rossi.

"Yeah, I was pretty sure we were going to die in that room."

"I'm not saying it's a bad thing, it's just. . ."

"Yeah, I agree," Rossi told him and headed to his own room. Rossi wasn't sure what to think of it all. A few days before when he thought Hotch might be a vigilante, Rossi tried telling himself that Hotch couldn't physically do some of the things the killer had done, now he wasn't too sure. Rossi sat down on his bed heavily. _And now he has just saved your life, and you're still thinking bad things about him?_ Rossi shook his head and got out the bottle of scotch he had brought with him. He poured himself a stiff drink and sat in the chair, sipping it as he tried to get a handle on his thoughts.

The next day, they tracked down the man who had escaped from the basement, and he led him to the mole in the Marshall's office. Johnson didn't need protecting anymore as Berg was dead, so they all got on the jet Friday afternoon for the quick ride home. Hotch looked like his face had been hit by a truck. The whole right side of his face was swollen and bruised and the left sides of his lips were fat and bruised. The team had never seen him look so bad.

Hotch hadn't been angry, but he had been overly quiet since the fight; and that bothered Rossi, so he went and sat down beside him at the back of the jet. "Why are you so quiet?"

"Dave, I'm so. . ." Hotch shook his head and looked out the window.

"Talk to me, Aaron."

Hotch turned back to him and looked him in the eyes. "I can't believe I did what I did in front of you. I am so sorry, Dave."

Rossi didn't like that Hotch added 'in front of you' onto that statement, but he gave Hotch a small smile. "I think you saved both of our lives, Aaron. I should be thanking you, not you apologizing to me."

"I honestly didn't think there was any negotiating with that man, and I couldn't handle the thought of him hurting you."

"He hurt you, too." Rossi told him as he looked at the bruises on Hotch's face, and Rossi was sure there were a couple bad ones on Hotch's stomach, but Hotch didn't complain about them.

"After the first hit, I was so mad I didn't even feel them."

"Do you feel them now?" Rossi really wanted to know.

"Oh yeah, I think he might have cracked one of my ribs," Hotch told him with a grimace and adjusted the way he was sitting.

Rossi gave him a shocked look. "Jesus, Aaron. You should have gone to the hospital!"

"It's just a little uncomfortable to breath too deep; I'll be fine."

Rossi shook his head. "When I woke up and realized we had both been knocked out, and you weren't waking up very fast. . . I was worried."

Hotch gave him a small smile. "I'm fine, Dave, really. I'm just worried about Jack when he sees me. He's going to freak out."

Rossi laughed. "Yep."

XXX

The team got home to find out they had the next day off and as long as no pressing cases came up they could have Sunday off, too. They all hurried through their case closing files and went out for a drink at their usual bar. To everyone's surprise, Hotch even joined them. They would have thought Hotch wouldn't have wanted to go out in public with the way his face looked, but he just smiled lopsidedly and said he didn't give a shit what anyone thought. Hotch didn't stay long, though, because he said he was getting Jack and since they actually had a Saturday off, that he wanted to get to bed early and spend as much time with Jack as possible. Rossi smiled at him and they all told him goodnight.

XXX

Garcia called them Sunday afternoon with a case. Rossi frowned but got ready and drove to the BAU. He was the last one to show up in the conference room and when Garcia started the presentation, Rossi choked on his coffee. Local police wanted help to catch the killer the press had dubbed 'The Dealer of Justice'.


	14. Chapter 14

**Chapter 14**

"Damn, Dave, you're supposed to swallow it not inhale it," Hotch joked as Rossi coughed and sputtered on his coffee.

Rossi held up a hand to let everyone know he was alright. Reid even reached over and patted him on the back a couple times. "I'm," cough. "Ok," cough. Rossi swallowed and finally took a deep breath.

Garcia waited a second and then continued. As she was going over the list of victims, Rossi was willing himself not to show any reaction. _Don't look at him. Don't look at him,_ he kept telling himself over and over. He couldn't help himself and he glanced at Hotch from the corner of his eyes. _Shit! Why is he looking at me?_

Garcia finally finished and everyone started to work out theories and ideas. "Do the cops really think one man has done all of these?" JJ asked clearly not sure if she agreed.

"Maybe all of the others, but the five guys together? There's no way one man did that," Morgan told them.

Hotch raised his brows as he looked at him. "You think it's totally separate, then?"

"Well, come on, Hotch. Five gang bangers at once?"

"I guess you're right. No man could do that," Hotch told him. Rossi was watching for any kind of reaction from Hotch, and he wasn't getting any.

"So this guy probably has a law enforcement back ground, with the lack of evidence," Blake pointed out.

"He could still be a cop. There are plenty of statistics where cops take the law into their own hands," Reid told them.

"With the public behind him, that could be why there are not any witnesses," JJ mused.

"Or he's just that good," Hotch pointed out and Rossi had to stop himself from looking at him.

"Well, I know this has to be my least favorite list of victims. These guys were convicted of or suspected of some pretty terrible stuff," Garcia told them.

"Even so, no one has the right to take the law into their own hands," Blake told her.

"Well, unless we find some evidence that the cops missed, there's no way we can even begin to figure out who this is," Morgan injected.

"That's what we have the profile for," Hotch told him.

"Maybe he's in the judicial system, like that one guy," JJ started.

"Marvin Doyle, the court reporter," Reid told her.

"Yeah."

"So we have to look at every cop and member of the judicial system in the whole metropolitan area? That's thousands of people," Garcia told them.

"We can narrow it down to men physically fit enough to actually be capable of committing the crimes," Hotch told her.

"I would guess with an age between 25 and 45?" Blake asked and nods from almost everyone she smiled.

"Well, that will narrow it done some, but I'm guessing it will still be in the hundreds," Garcia told them. She didn't mind searching, but she liked her lists to be smaller.

"And there has to have been a stressor," JJ pointed out. "Something made this man turn into a killer."

Rossi again stole a glance at Hotch, but he was focused on JJ.

"Maybe it's just someone who has been wronged by the justice system and decided to take care of things himself," Rossi finally spoke. He knew he had to or they would all know something was wrong.

"I thought we were trying to make the list shorter?" Garcia asked him jokingly.

"Sorry, Kitten, but it could be."

"Dave's right. At this point in time we have no clue who could be responsible," Hotch told her.

"Well, at least now that they've asked for help, we'll be able to see the actual crime scenes," Morgan injected.

"If he kills again. It seems to be pretty haphazard when he strikes," Reid pointed out.

"Well, we'll start with the preliminaries, but unless something else is brought to our attention, we can't just focus on this case," Hotch told them and stood up. "Reid, work the geographical profile. Blake and JJ, you work on victimology. Morgan and Dave, go over the crime scene photos and see if you can actually tie all these crimes to one person."

"What are you going to do?" Rossi asked him.

Hotch gave him a strange look. "I'm going to help Garcia narrow down the list of possibles."

"Oh, ok."

XXX

By seven that night, Hotch walked back into the conference room to the boards set up as a chronological chart of the crime scenes. Rossi and Morgan admitted to not being able to tie any of the crimes together other than through the shear brutality of the murders. "If it is just one guy, he sure is pissed," Morgan told him and Rossi almost choked on his coffee again. Hotch looked at him again, but decided to call it a night. He sent everyone home and walked to his office. Rossi sank down in his chair in his own office. _What the hell am I going to do? If Hotch is responsible, there's no evidence proving it. If he's not, and I think he is, what is that going to do to him? What's it going to do to me? _Rossi put his elbows on his knees and put his head in his hands. _And if I find any evidence, would I actually turn it over? Could I send my best friend to jail?_

"Hey," Hotch said from Rossi's doorway.

Rossi jumped as if someone had punched him. He looked at Hotch. The bruises on his face were starting to turn greenish purple. Rossi swallowed hard. "Hey."

"You want to join me and Jack for dinner?"

"Tonight?"

"No, next week." Hotch studied Rossi for a moment. "Yes, tonight."

"Why?"

"What do you mean, why? What's wrong with you?"

_Stop acting like an idiot, Dave!_ "Sorry, it's been a long day," Rossi told him as he stood up. "I would love to join you. Well, actually that depends on what you're making," Rossi added with a smile.

Hotch smiled back. "I was just gonna order in pizza," Hotch told him as he led the way across the bullpen to the elevator.

"Sausage?" Rossi asked as he followed.

XXX

The next day the team got a case, and since the 'Dealer of Justice' case was at a standstill, they headed to Alabama to help stop a spree killer. After only three days they were headed back and Rossi could tell Hotch was hiding the anger building in him. He sat down next to him on the jet. "How you doing?"

"I'm fine," Hotch told him a little too quickly.

"Really?"

"Don't."

"Don't what?"

Hotch gave him a look that almost made him forget to breathe.

"You said I could go with you the next time," Rossi reminded him.

"I don't plan on going anywhere."

"You're not getting Jack?"

"He's staying with his grandparents for a few days."

Rossi wasn't sure whether Hotch was planning on going anywhere or not with Jack not coming home. Maybe he was going to try to get through the anger on his own. Rossi couldn't leave it, though. "So why don't you come over to my place?" Rossi noticed Hotch gripping the arm rests way too tightly.

"No thanks."

"Hotch, I'm not going to let this go. You know that."

Hotch fixed him with his stare. "You really want me to lose it on you, Dave?"

"Are you saying you can't control yourself when it happens?" Rossi asked suddenly very worried.

"I can control myself just fine," Hotch told him coldly.

"Then why would you lose it on me?"

"Because you're pissing me off!" Hotch yelled as he stood up and went to the other end of the jet. Everyone stopped what they were doing and watched Hotch. Hotch gave Rossi one more dirty look and went into the galley area and shut the curtain so no one could see him.

Everyone turned and looked at Rossi. Rossi shrugged and looked at them sheepishly. When Hotch didn't come out of the galley, Rossi sighed and went to him. Morgan grabbed his arm as Rossi passed him. "Don't you think you should leave him alone?" Morgan asked quietly.

"I need to apologize. I shouldn't have pushed him."

"I don't think he'll even hear you with as mad as he is," Reid told him.

"I thought we agreed to let him have his space when he got like this?" JJ asked Rossi.

He couldn't tell them why he needed to watch Hotch, so he finally nodded and went and sat back down. He just hoped he could get to Hotch when the time was right.

Hotch didn't come out for the rest of the flight, and he was the first one off the jet. The whole team got up and delayed Rossi from getting off. They thought they were helping Hotch, and Rossi understood them, but his frustration about the whole thing was about to make him go ballistic. "Alright! I won't bother him tonight," he told them and they finally let him off the jet. Rossi shook his head as he went to his car. On his way home, he prayed that there weren't any 'Justice' murders on the news in the morning.

XXX

To Rossi's delight, there weren't any reported murders, and he started to think that maybe he was wrong. He prayed he was wrong. Another case took them to Montana and they ended up being gone for a week. Once they were back home they all went out for a drink to their local bar. The evening was going fine until some guy started hitting on JJ. She tried to make the man leave her alone, but the man just wouldn't take a hint. Hotch stepped in and tried to make the man see reason, but he pushed Hotch and the whole team was up on their feet. Before anyone could do anything, the powerful man punched Hotch in the face. By the time Hotch brought his face back to look at the man, blood was running out of his lip and anger was showing in his eyes. The whole team knew what was about to happen, so Morgan grabbed the guy and started for the door. Reid and Rossi struggled to hold Hotch back so he couldn't follow.

"Jesus, are you alright, Hotch?" JJ asked him as she used a napkin to wipe the blood off Hotch's face.

Hotch shook the guys off his arms. "I'm fine!" he snapped.

Reid shot Rossi a look that told him he didn't think Hotch was fine. Rossi handed Hotch his drink. "Come on, sit back down, and let's try to enjoy the rest of the evening."

Hotch took a deep breath and nodded. They all sat back down and Morgan finally came back. Rossi kept on eye on Hotch, but he couldn't tell if he was getting to the boiling point or not. It worried Rossi that Hotch may have figured out a way to hide it.


	15. Chapter 15

**Chapter 15**

"Son of a bitch!" Rossi yelled as he watched the morning news. The Dealer of Justice had struck again. This time he had killed two known drug dealers. They had been beaten and then injected with copious amounts of their own heroin causing fatal overdoses. Rossi shook his head. He didn't think that Hotch was even that mad by the time they left the bar. They all knew he wanted to kill the man who had punched him, but that was a good two hours before they had went home. _Well, some of us went home!_ Rossi mentally kicked himself for not realizing that Hotch was at the point of blowing up.

His phone rang. "Yep, I see it. Sure I'll meet you there," He told Morgan. They all wanted to meet at the scene. _Damn it!_ He quickly grabbed his stuff and walked out of his house.

XXX

Rossi joined Morgan as they looked at the scene. They were the only two there at that point. "It looks like the same guy," Morgan told him. "And just as pissed as ever. It's definitely personal for this guy."

"You think he knows them personally?" Rossi asked him.

"You think it's just someone who's pissed at the world?" Hotch asked him.

Rossi flinched. He hadn't heard him coming up behind him. He looked at Hotch's face. Hotch had his sunglasses on so Rossi couldn't read his eyes, but he didn't like the grin Hotch was wearing. He also noticed that Hotch's hands were in his pockets. "Possibly."

Hotch nodded and kept staring at him. Rossi finally turned away from him and knelt down by the bodies. The breath caught in his chest as he noticed a black hair on one of the blond men's shoulder. _Shit!_ Just then JJ and Reid arrived together. Morgan went to greet them and Hotch was talking to the police officer who had found the bodies. Rossi reached up and quickly grabbed the hair and put it in his pocket. He stood up and took a deep breath. He couldn't believe what he had just done, but what else could he do? He had to have proof, but he didn't want the whole team to share in that proof until he could make up his mind on what to do with it. Rossi knew of a private lab that would test the hair for DNA for him without any questions.

"What did you just do?" Hotch asked him from behind,

Rossi flinched because he hadn't heard him again. He stood up quickly. "I. . . nothing," Rossi stammered.

Hotch stared at him. "My God!" he started quietly. "You think I did this."

_Oh shit!_ "What?"

Hotch laughed. "You really think I'm stupid enough to do something like this right under the team's nose?" Rossi looked at him with concern. He didn't like the way he didn't deny the other killings. "You do! You think I did this!"

"I never said that," Rossi finally told him as he stepped closer to Hotch so they could talk quietly.

"Wow. I thought you didn't like me now, but it just turns out it's because I'm a killer, huh?"

"Hotch. . . I . . ." Rossi didn't know where to start, but he definitely didn't want to discuss it there. "We can talk later."

Hotch shook his head and walked away from him.

_Damn it!_ Rossi shook his head. He went to talk to the local police and decided he was done there. He took the hair to the lab on his way back to the BAU.

XXX

Later that afternoon in the bullpen they all came to the conclusion that even with another crime scene, they still had no clue who their unsub was. They had started checking out all of the men on Garcia's list, but so far every one of them had a solid alibi for at least two of the murders. Without getting anywhere, Garcia told them about a case in Arizona. A suspected rapist had turned into a killer and the Phoenix PD wanted the BAU's help. They were on the jet before dinner time. They all noticed that Hotch and Rossi weren't talking again.

XXX

Two days later, they knew who their unsub was and they were staking out his house to wait for him to return from work. Hotch and Rossi watched from one SUV as Truman Stewart walked towards his door. "He's almost inside," Hotch told the team through the com link. As soon as the door shut, Hotch and Rossi jumped out of the vehicle and crossed the street to serve their warrant. Morgan and JJ were waiting by the back door of the unsub's house. They didn't want to take any chances of losing him.

Before Hotch could even attempt to kick down the door, a shot rang out and Hotch dove into Rossi to take him to the ground. Another shot rang out and a hole was blown through the front door. "Are you ok?" Hotch asked Rossi frantically. Rossi nodded and they scrambled out of the firing line.

They heard a shot from inside the house, and Hotch realized that Morgan and JJ had breeched the back door. Suddenly the front door flung open and Truman was running for the street. Hotch jumped up and took off after him. Truman ran across the street and was jumping the fence on the other side by the time Hotch made it to the street. Hotch ran without even looking and as soon as he stepped out into the street, Rossi heard wheels squealing and glass breaking. "No!" Rossi yelled as he watched Hotch get hit, roll up onto the hood of the sedan, smash into the windshield, and then come rolling off as the vehicle skidded to a stop. Rossi ran as fast as he could and his heart stopped beating as he watched Hotch fall to the ground; the back of head slammed down onto the pavement. Rossi ran to his friend and knelt down next to him. "Oh God, Hotch!"

Morgan came running up to him and saw Truman still running through the park on the other side of the street. Rossi looked at Morgan. "Go! Get that bastard!" Morgan nodded and took off after the man.

JJ came running up beside Rossi, she had her phone out and was calling for an ambulance. The driver who hit Hotch came up, crying hysterically. JJ took her away from Hotch.

Rossi grabbed his friend's hand. "No, Hotch. Not again!" He reached up and felt for a pulse. He let out the breath he was holding when he felt it beating strong. He thanked God for Hotch being in such good physical shape; it probably saved his life. Hotch moaned and tried to reach for his head. Rossi grabbed his hand. He didn't want him to hurt himself even more. "Hotch?"

"Da. . . "

"Come on, open your eyes."

"Dave?" Hotch asked as his eyes fluttered and he tried to focus.

"Right here. When are you going to stop scaring me to death?"

"Sorry," Hotch told him weakly as he finally saw his friend knealing down next to him.

"You know an old man like me can only take so much," Rossi told him with a smile.

Hotch smiled back at him and then looked around. Hotch's smile was replaced with one of fear and confusion. "Dave?"

Rossi didn't know what to make of Hotch's expression. "Right here," Rossi told him with concern.

"Where are we?" Hotch asked him as his eyes darted around.

Rossi could hear the fear in his voice and it made his chest tighten.


	16. Chapter 16

**Chapter 16**

Hotch lifted his upper body and supported himself on his elbows. Rossi tried to push him back down, but Hotch struggled against him. He grabbed his shirt and Rossi could see the panic in his eyes. "Dave?"

"Calm down, Hotch."

"No Dave, what's going on?" he asked him frantically.

Rossi didn't know what was happening to his friend but it was scaring the shit out of him. "You were just hit by a car, Aaron. Calm down. Help will be here in a moment," Rossi tried explaining what happened to calm him down but it seemed to upset him more.

"A car?" Hotch finally noticed the car just a few feet from him.

Morgan made his way back and handed off their unsub to one of the local police. "Damn, Hotch! I know you don't know any fear, but tangling with a car? That's ballsy." Hotch looked at him like he didn't even know who he was. Hotch's breathing quickened. "Hotch?" Morgan asked getting concerned.

Hotch looked back to Rossi. "This is a joke right?" Hotch asked with a nervous chuckle.

"What?" Rossi asked him; he couldn't follow what Hotch was thinking and it scared him to think Hotch's mind was messed up even more. _God, not something else! The poor man can't handle any more problems!_

Hotch looked at Morgan and then back to Dave. "This is some sick joke, right? Well, it isn't funny!" Hotch yelled as he shook his head frantically.

"What are you talking about?" Morgan asked him as he knelt down beside his obviously distressed boss.

"I got knocked out and you all changed my clothes real quick and drug me out onto the street, right? I know you love your pranks, but you've gone too far!" Hotch told him as he tried to get up.

Rossi held him down, his chest was tightening. "This isn't a joke!"

Hotch looked at him and his eyes teared up. He looked at his surroundings a little more closely. "Oh, please, tell me this is a joke." He looked back at Dave and his tears fell down his cheeks. "Where's the container?"

"What container? Damn it, Aaron, you're scaring me!" Rossi told him as his fear started to gain momentum.

"You're scared?" Hotch looked around one more time and looked Dave in the eyes. "We're not even in Michigan are we?"

_Oh shit!_ "You better lay back down, Aaron. Help's coming." As if on cue, the sirens from the ambulance could finally be heard.

"No, Dave! Tell me we're still in Michigan!" Hotch pleaded with him as he grabbed his arm.

"Oh, man!" Morgan said, and Hotch looked at him and he could tell they were definitely not where he thought they should be.

Rossi's heart sank at the look on Hotch's face. "What's the last thing you remember?"

Hotch took a deep breath and closed his eyes. "Pushing you out of that damn container because I thought there was a bomb in it." He took another deep breath and opened his eyes to look at Dave again, and he knew there was a big problem with his answer. "I'm missing something, aren't I?"

Rossi pushed down on his chest with one hand and held his head with the other. "You need to lay still, Aaron," he told him and laid him back down on the street, and Hotch let him.

"I'm missing something! Tell me, Dave!" The look on Rossi's face scared him even more. "Please!"

Rossi took his hand away from Hotch's head and it was bloody. He wasn't sure he should tell him, but he couldn't ignore the pleading look Hotch was giving him. "The explosion in Michigan was over two months ago."

"What?!" Hotch tried to get up, but Rossi held him down. Hotch's breathing quickened even more and Rossi was afraid he'd start hyperventilating.

"Aaron, it'll be alright. You've hit your head again. . ."

"Again?"

"Please calm down," Rossi told him more forcibly.

Hotch nodded and started inhaling through his nose to try to slow his breathing. Two medics came running up and Rossi moved to allow them to get to Hotch.

"He was knocked unconscious, the back of his head is bleeding, and he's lost some memories," Rossi explained to the men. They started examining him. "He suffered a TBI two months ago that put him in a coma, too."

One of the medics looked at Rossi with concern and looked back at Hotch. "Is anything hurting?"

_Shit! I was in a coma?_ "TBI?" He asked Rossi.

"Traumatic brain injury," the medic told him simply.

"Oh, God," Hotch closed his eyes and focused on his body. He opened his eyes and shook his head. "My side hurts a little, but nothing else." JJ came walking up and Morgan told her what had happened. When Hotch saw her tear up, he knew he was in trouble. _ Jesus! Two months? What the hell have I been doing for two months?_

One of the medics tried to put a collar on Hotch and he pushed it away. "My neck's fine!"

"Hotch! Let them do their job! Damn it, relax!" Rossi told him.

Hotch held up his hands in defeat and let the men do what they wanted to him. If he couldn't remember two months' worth of days, maybe he wasn't fine.

Within minutes they had him loaded into the ambulance. Rossi rode with him and he held Hotch's hand on the way. Rossi was praying that Hotch would be alright, that there wasn't something else horribly wrong with him.

XXX

Rossi paced in the waiting room. _I swear, Aaron, you're going to be the death of me!_ The rest of the team had shown up and they had all tried to get him to sit down, but he was too worked up with concern to be still. The doctors were taking forever and it was worrying him. Finally a doctor came out and gave them an update. "He has a couple of broken ribs, and a severe concussion." Rossi swallowed hard. "His MRI did show some swelling of his brain, but I believe that will go away on its own with a little time."

"He has memory loss. Will that go away, too?" Rossi asked him.

"That's hard to tell. This blow added onto top of his previous brain injury. . . We just don't know. Those memories may be gone forever, or he could start remembering any minute."

"I want to see him," Rossi told him forcibly.

"Of course. We are going to keep him over night for observations, so as soon as we get him settled into a room, I'll send a nurse to come get you," he told them and headed back into the main part of the ER.

Rossi sighed heavily and finally sank into a seat.

"He'll be fine, Dave," JJ told him as she put her arm around his shoulder.

"Yeah, it's not like he'll have lost anything important if he never remembers," Blake pointed out.

"As long as he doesn't get even scarier, he'll be good," Morgan told him.

Rossi nodded, but he was thinking the same thing. _As long as it doesn't change Hotch even more. . . God, I won't be able to handle it if he's even stranger._

"Let's just make sure we don't make him mad," Reid told them.

They all nodded.

Within twenty minutes, a nurse came out to show them to Hotch's room. The team let Rossi go in alone so that he could judge what kind of mood Hotch was in. "Hey," Rossi told him with a smile as he walked in. His heart sank, though, when he saw the look on Hotch's face. It was the intensified Hotch stare.

"Not so loud," Hotch told him weakly as he put a hand on his forehead.

"What's wrong?" Rossi asked him with concern.

"My head is splitting open. Do me a favor and hit the light."

_Not the headaches again_. Rossi went back towards the door and shut off the overhead light. "That better?"

Hotch nodded and Rossi noticed that his face relaxed. "How else are you feeling?"

"My side hurts, but a couple broken ribs after getting hit by a car isn't too much to take, huh?" Rossi gave him a puzzled look. "What?"

"How are you emotionally?"

"Emotionally?

"Yeah."

Hotch gave him a puzzled look. "I've just been told that I've lost two months and that I may never get them back. I guess the closest thing I can say to describe what I'm feeling is confused. Is that alright, or am I supposed to be feeling something else?" Hotch couldn't figure out why Rossi was acting so weird.

"You're not mad?"

"Really, Dave? Like you've seen me mad so many times before."

Rossi raised his brows. _Could it be?_ "So you don't feel any anger?"

"I'm going to if you don't tell me why you're acting like you don't even know me," Hotch told him as he started to get worried.

Rossi smiled. "Sorry. It's just that. . . Nothing. I'm just really glad you're ok. The team's here. Can they come in?"

Hotch gave him a questioning look. "Why would you even have to ask?"

"I just wanted to make sure your headache wasn't too bad," Rossi thought quickly.

"Are they going to come in here yelling?" Hotch asked with a smile.

"I'll tell them to keep it down," Rossi told him with a grin and left to go get them.

"So? How is he?" Morgan asked him.

"I'm not sure yet, but he doesn't seem mad. He said you all could come in, too," Rossi told them as he hid his excitement. He couldn't wait to see how Hotch acted with them.

"Are you sure?" JJ asked him as she remembered the last time they all visited him in the hospital.

Rossi nodded and turned to lead the way to Hotch's room.


	17. Chapter 17

**Chapter 17**

The whole team eyed Hotch warily as they walked into his room. Hotch looked at them all and started to get worried. "What's wrong?"

"What do you mean?" JJ asked him.

"Why are you all looking at me like that?"

"Like what?" Morgan asked him.

"Like. . . I don't know. . . just weird." Hotch noticed that Reid shot Rossi a look. "Reid?" Hotch asked.

Reid gulped and took a step backwards as his eyes went to Rossi again.

Hotch's hand went to his forehead and he massaged his temples. When he looked up again, he had his stare trained on them. They all cast glances at each other. "Maybe we should let you rest," Morgan suggested and they all headed for the door.

"Ok," Hotch told them reservedly. He knew something was wrong, but he had no idea what it was.

Rossi wasn't sure if it was Hotch's headache or if Hotch hadn't changed, but he resigned himself to let Hotch rest and see what he was like tomorrow. "You want me to tell the doctor you need something for your head?" Rossi asked once everyone else had left.

"Please. I'll see you tomorrow, right?"

"Of course. We'll have everything wrapped up, and all you'll have to do is go home."

"That's good because I couldn't help you close the files anyway," Hotch told him with a weak smile.

Rossi nodded. "Try to get some rest."

XXX

Rossi took one SUV to pick up Hotch while the others went to the jet to wait for them. By the time Rossi got to the hospital, Hotch was ready and waiting for him. "Are you cleared to fly?" Rossi asked him knowing that Hotch would probably fly anyway.

"Yes, but I had to promise the doctor a follow up visit at home," Hotch told them as he held his head at a strange angle.

"Are you sure you're alright," Rossi asked him with concern.

"My head hurts, Dave, and if I understand things correctly, it has a right to hurt."

Rossi eyed him warily. _Maybe he hasn't changed._ "It does, but you sure you don't want to rest for a day or so? I can stay with you and then we can drive back."

The look Hotch gave him told him he thought that idea was horrible. "I just want to go home."

"Alright, Aaron, but you're resting on the jet," Rossi told him in his fatherly tone, but was expecting Hotch to argue. He didn't, all he did was nod strangely and motioned for Rossi to lead the way. Rossi grabbed Hotch's bag and lead the way to the waiting SUV.

Hotch looked around once they were outside. Rossi noticed his hesitation. "What?"

"I still don't know where we are."

Rossi chuckled. "Phoenix."

Hotch nodded and got in the SUV.

Rossi looked at Hotch as he got in. "Are you sure you're ok?"

"Jesus, Dave. I'm fine. Stop worrying so much."

_I'm fine? That sounds like old Hotch_. Rossi gave him a small smile and nodded. Hotch studied him, but his head hurt too much to try to figure out what was wrong with Rossi, so he leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

Once they got to the jet, Hotch climbed the stairs and noticed how they all looked at him. He was sure something was wrong with them. "What?" he asked.

They all quickly looked away and mumbled 'nothing' or 'sorry' and tried to act like they were engaged in something else. Hotch shook his head and walked to the back of the jet. It was obvious they didn't want him around them. He sat down heavily as he tried to figure out what was going on. Jessica was going to keep Jack for the night, so he had a night to figure out what he was going to say to him, too, about his lack of memory. He shook his head and hoped he hadn't lost anything important about his son. He leaned his head back and closed his eyes.

Rossi finally came on and when he saw Hotch sitting in the back by himself he shook his head. _Damn it! _Rossi sat down with the rest of the team but where he could keep an eye on Hotch.

Hotch never said a word the whole ride home, and Rossi saw him grab his head a couple of times. Even if Hotch hadn't changed, he still felt sorry for him. _Nobody deserves to keep getting hurt like that._

Once they were back at the BAU, Rossi grabbed Hotch's bag and took it to his car. He knew Hotch wouldn't want him treating him like a child, but Rossi thought he needed it. Besides, he had to find out one way or the other if Hotch was still new Hotch. He had survived his anger before, and he prayed that if Hotch let loose, he could survive it again.

Hotch saw Dave grab his bag and he sighed. "What are you doing?" Hotch asked him as he walked up to him. Hotch could see his car sitting in its usual spot.

"I'm driving you home."

"I can drive myself, Dave."

_He said Dave. _"I know, but your head hurts, so I thought I'd keep an eye on you." _Brace yourself. It's coming._

"Alright, but that means you have to fix dinner."

_What? Oh my God! Oh my God!_ "That's fine." _Keep pushing. _"I'll probably stay the night, just to make sure you're ok." _It's gotta happen now. _

"Unless I've done something to the guest room in the last two months, you can crash there," Hotch told him as he got in Rossi's car.

Rossi couldn't hold back his smile any longer. _Thank you, God!_ He quickly got in and looked at the man sitting in his passenger seat. He smiled even wider.

"What?"

"What?"

"Why do you look like the cat that ate the canary?"

Rossi shook his head. "Just glad to be spending some time with my friend. Is that alright?"

Hotch eyed him warily. Now he knew something terrible had happened, but he wanted to wait until he was home to confront him about it. "I guess." He rested his head back and closed his eyes. It didn't escape his notice that Rossi's smile never left the whole way to his house.

Rossi led the way to Hotch's door. "You haven't changed the code, have you?" Hotch gave him a look. "Oh, sorry. Well, I guess we're about to find out." Rossi opened the door with his key and went to the alarm pad. He smiled when the code worked. Hotch walked past him to the kitchen. Everything looked normal. He opened the fridge and was shocked to find a case of beer. _What the hell?_ He decided to check out the rest of the house.

Rossi watched him intently, but didn't say anything.

"What the hell?!" Hotch yelled from down the hall.

_Oh Shit! I forgot about his office!_ "Just wait a minute," Rossi told him as he went down the hall quickly.

"What happened?" Hotch asked as he took in his empty office.

Rossi was actually surprised by it. Everything had been cleaned up and everything that had been destroyed had been removed. Other than being empty, the only thing that was awry was the numerous holes in the walls. "I was going to ask Morgan about fixing those."

Hotch looked at him with concern. "I did this?"

Rossi nodded slowly. "You weren't exactly yourself."

"So all my stuff. . . I destroyed it?"

Rossi could hear the sadness in his voice. "Yeah, but we'll get it all replaced."

"How bad was it?"

"Honestly?"

"Please."

"It looked like a tornado struck in here."

Hotch shook his head, shut the door, and walked to his bedroom hesitantly.

"This is the only room you messed up, and Jack never saw it," Rossi told him.

Hotch looked back at him and nodded. He went in the bedroom and the first place he went was his closet. He held his breath as he opened the doors. He let his breath out in a sigh as he looked at his suits. He had thought something must have happened to them, too, since he was wearing one when he came to and he hadn't packed any. He took a deep breath and decided it was time to find out what he had done in the past two months. _You're going to answer some questions, Dave._


	18. Chapter 18

**Chapter 18**

Hotch walked back out into his living room. "Alright, out with it."

"Out with what?"

"What the hell did I do these last two months?"

"What do you mean?"

"You know exactly what I mean, Dave. What did I do to make you act like you haven't seen me in two months?"

Rossi shook his head. He knew he had to tell him something; Hotch was too smart to not know something had happened. Rossi was worried, though, that saying too much could bring the memories back and destroy his friend. He sighed and sat down on the couch. "When you woke up from the coma, you were different."

Hotch sat down on his coffee table so he was in front of Rossi. "Different how?"

"You were. . . well, scary."

"Scary? What did I do?"

"You had an anger issue."

"Anger?" Hotch's look of shock made Rossi fell sorry for him. He knew Hotch had always prided himself on being able to control his anger, especially with the father he had. "Oh God! Did I do anything to Jack?" Hotch asked as a look of terror crossed his face.

"No!" Rossi said quickly and Hotch relaxed a little.

"So who did I aim it at?" Hotch asked him slowly as he studied his face. "No! Oh God! I did something to you?" Hotch got up and turned away from him. He didn't like what he was finding out.

Rossi stood up and put his hand on Hotch's shoulder. "No, you didn't do anything to me."

Hotch turned around to face him again. "I said something." Rossi nodded. Hotch could only think of a few things that he could have said to upset Rossi, and every one of them made him want to crawl under a rock. "Dave, I'm so sorry. . ."

"Don't. You don't need to apologize. It wasn't you," Rossi told him sincerely.

"Yeah, but. . ."

"But nothing, Aaron. As long as you don't revert back to acting like that again, everything will be fine."

"So I was an even bigger ass then I am now? I didn't think that was possible," Hotch told him dryly as he sat down again.

"Neither did I, until it happened," Rossi told him with a smile.

"So that's why the team was acting so weird?"

"Yeah," is all Rossi said.

"What else aren't you telling me?"

"Nothing," Rossi lied.

"Don't give me that, Dave. I know you better than that. Apparently it's pretty bad if you don't want to tell me."

Rossi knew he had to tell him something or he wouldn't leave it alone. "You didn't have any fear, and in some situations you scared the shit out of us."

Hotch looked even more shocked. "No fear? Damn that would have been nice."

"No it wasn't. That's probably what made you run out into the street without looking both ways in Phoenix."

"But if that wouldn't have happened, I'd still be an ass."

"That's true."

"There's still something else you're not telling me."

"You know, I think I'd just rather forget the whole thing like you did."

Hotch could tell Rossi didn't want to tell him anymore, so he let it drop. He had other ways of finding things out and other people to ask. He had to ask Rossi one more thing, though. "I didn't hurt anyone did I?"

Rossi used thirty years of experience to mask his face. He was sure Hotch was just asking about the team, but he couldn't let on to what he thought he knew. "No."

Hotch didn't like the way it took him a little too long to answer. "Dave? Please tell me I didn't hurt anyone care about!"

"Of course not. You might have scared the team a few times, but, no, you didn't hurt any of them." Rossi smiled as Hotch relaxed a little more. "I thought you were going to hit me once, though."

Hotch's look of horror made Rossi laugh. "You're not serious are you?"

"Yeah, I am. I think you should by me dinner to make up for it."

Hotch finally smiled. "Sure, but you probably deserved it," Hotch told him as he picked up his phone to order them dinner.

Rossi was so excited about having his Hotch back that he wanted to call the team and throw a party, but he needed to make sure it was going to last. He would have to see how Hotch was in the morning.

XXX

Rossi almost chocked on his coffee as Hotch came down the hall. _He's wearing a suit! Thank you God!_ Rossi was never so happy to see his boss in a suit before.

Hotch went and poured himself a cup of coffee and looked at Rossi smile. "What?"

"Just glad to see you're still you."

Hotch eyed him warily. "So what kind of cases did we get?"

"You don't need to worry about them."

"And why not?"

"It wasn't you. Just focus on the here and now and the future," Rossi told him with a pat on the shoulder. Hotch gave him a strange look and went to get his stuff together. Rossi drove them to work and on the way in, a young agent stopped Dave in the hallway. Hotch walked into the bullpen and everyone turned to stare at him. He stopped in his tracks. Their looks of shock and disbelief sent his hand casually to the front of his pants to make sure his fly wasn't open. "What?" He asked them self-consciously.

"Nothing," Morgan told him with a smile.

"You look good, Hotch," JJ told him with another smile.

Hotch noticed they were all smiling. He shook his head can continued to his office. _Damn. Apparently I dressed like an ass, too._

He looked at the pile of case files sitting on his desk. He had asked Garcia to get every case they had worked on since his accident in Detroit. He knew Dave didn't want him looking into them, but he also knew Dave was hiding something big from him. He drummed his fingers on the files. _Might as well start with the latest case first._ He got up and headed to the conference room. Garcia had told him they were working a current case about some vigilante dubbed 'The Dealer of Justice'. Before he could open the door, Rossi stepped in front of him. "What are you doing?" Rossi asked him innocently.

"I'm going to look at the 'Dealer' case."

"You don't need to do that. The police have put it on the back burner because there hasn't been another killing in about a week. They suspect the guy had either finally killed his intended target or something happened to him. It's no longer our case."

"That doesn't mean I can't give it a once over."

"Don't worry, if you're bored, there are some consults I can give you."

"Why don't you want me to see the cases I've missed?"

"Cause you weren't you. No sense in you seeing all that."

Hotch studied him for a moment. He knew he must have done something horrible. "What did I do that you don't want me finding out?"

"I don't know what you mean. I just don't think you need to stress yourself over something you can't remember. There's a reason you can't remember, and maybe I'm worried about you turning back into mean Hotch."

"Mean Hotch? Is that what you called me?"

"Not to your face."

Hotch huffed. "I bet." Hotch told him with a look of shame. "Alright," he told him and headed back to his office to read the files before Rossi found out he had them.

He sat down and looked at the first case he attended after the accident. He read through it and didn't notice anything strange in it. He did read that he was the one to obtain the confession, but that wasn't a bad thing; he'd obtained several confessions over the years. He took out the next one and it seemed fine, too. It wasn't until he read about the case in Texas that Hotch did a double take. Their unsub was found dead with his latest victim in a cabin that none of them had thought about checking out before then. Hotch put the file down and drummed his fingers on it. Something didn't seem right about it. He knew the local police took them off the case, and that they had presumed that one of the victim's family had gotten to the unsub, but it just seemed a little too neat. He knew if he called the police station that there wouldn't be any news on the killer because he was sure they didn't even look. The monster was dead and that's all they cared about, but it still bothered Hotch that he hadn't pushed to stay on the case and bring the killer to justice.

After he had went through several more cases and not finding anything unusual, he finally came to the one with carjackings in DC. When he read about the part where he entered a hotel room where a man had a grenade, he almost choked on his coffee. _Jesus Christ! Dave wasn't kidding about not having any fear! How could I've been such a dumbass? _He shook his head. Several more cases and nothing shocking or serious led Hotch to the case with the Marshalls. As he read through it he got scared when he read about how he and Rossi had been kidnapped. Once he read the final report, the one where it listed him as killing the man they were protecting the witness from, he swallowed hard. According to the file, Hotch attacked the man to protect Rossi and ended up killing him, wounding another man, and helping Rossi so they could escape. He put the file down and put his head in his hands. He knew the man had beat him and was about to beat Rossi, but it still bothered him that he had taken another's life. _Maybe that's what Dave didn't want me to see._

After a few more case files, Hotch finally read about the case in Phoenix. Hotch shook his head, so many cases in such a short amount of time. None of it sparked any recollection in him, though, and he was a little discouraged. He wasn't sure about the Marshall case being what Rossi didn't want him to see either, but if it wasn't case related then he had no idea how he was going to find out what it was. _Maybe it's not worth worrying about._

After a long boring day of case files and consults, Hotch was glad to be going home. He stopped in Rossi's office to tell him goodnight. Rossi was rearranging his go bag, and Hotch noticed an unopened envelope on Rossi's desk. It was from a lab in Virginia. Hotch picked it up to get a closer look at it. "What's this?" he asked Rossi.

Rossi turned around quickly. He hadn't even realized Hotch had come in his office. When he saw what was in Hotch's hand he almost had a coronary trying to get it away from Hotch. "It's nothing!" Rossi half yelled as he grabbed it out of Hotch's hand.

"If it's nothing, then way are you so worried about it?"

"I'm not. I thought you had something else," Rossi lied as he stepped behind his desk.

Hotch's look told him he didn't believe him. "Sure."

"Look, see," Rossi started and moved to his paper shredder. "It's nothing!" he told him with a smile and fed it into the top.

"You never even opened it."

"I didn't need to. It's trash. It contents mean nothing to me now." Rossi grabbed his bag. "You coming?"

Hotch nodded and followed Rossi across the bullpen. Hotch shook his head. _Things will get back to normal soon. I hope!_

"You want to have dinner with me and Jack?"

Rossi smiled. "Sure."

They decided to ride together and Hotch was nervous about picking up Jack. They had called Jessica and Jack to tell them about Hotch's new accident, but Rossi had not told them about the old Hotch being back. He wanted to see their reactions. Hotch knocked on Jessica's door, and Jack opened it. "Hey, Buddy!" Hotch told him with a smile.

Jack's eyes got wide. "Daddy?" Jack asked excitedly and then looked at Rossi. Rossi nodded quickly and Jack threw himself into Hotch arms. "I missed you soooooo much!" Jack told him as he hugged Hotch neck as tightly as he could.

Hotch looked at Rossi, but Rossi just smiled. _God it's good to have you back, Aaron!_

**The End**


End file.
